A woman and her daughter came in here a few minutes ago.
Customer: There's no way your rates can go as low as $79, is there?
Me: Do you work for the federal government?
Customer: I work for God's government.
Me: Well, unfortunately, our government rate is the only rate that low and is only applicable to federal government employees.
Customer: Well how about that place across the highway. That place a Patel?
Me: A what?
Customer: You know, does an Indian own it?
Me: I have absolutely no idea.
Customer: Well, I just ask because I bet their rates are better but I don't want to deal with one of those people.
Me: Sorry, I have not looked into the race of the person who owns my competition.
Customer: Well, you're no help. God's government not being honored for the government rate and you don't know anything about your competition.
Me: Sorry.
Customer: You will be. God's government is better than that one in Washington.
Then they discuss staying at the other hotel across the street because it's part of a rewards program they're in and leave.
In hindsight, I should have told them that God's government can get on the federal government rate as soon as the pope has his people negotiate a rate with our company. Would have given me a great segue into mentioning that I'm Catholic, which probably would have gotten them out of my hair sooner.