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Is not having fun a legit reason for leaving a group.Follow
So Im leveling my Summoner in Yhoator Jungle, Im in a group with whm,thf,nin,war,and a blm. Its pretty late in the evening and I had, had a bad day (cry me a river I know it happens to all of us) well... we start xping and the thief starts ******** about the way Im playing my summoner. She tells me I should summon use only buffs then desummon and sit back and heal. She then starts to ***** about not being able to see past Ifrit and starts ragging on me using my SMNs to do melee dmg (mind you I wasnt slowing the xp down I brought plenty o juice and I would release and start resting at the end of the fights and if things got hairy I would release and concentrate on healing) We were doing great chaining Mandys but still this thief kept on at me. It was very frustrating for me because as long as I am not hindering the party in anyway I think I should be able to play my job how I want to play it. Not only that but the bloodpacts require the summon to get TP to make them effective. So Im talking to the whm who is in my linkshell and ask her if it is because I am in a bad mood that this is getting under my skin she said no that it was annoying her too. Well The whm and I had agreed that I would dia the monsters. I didnt have it on macro but was just using the CTRL M for it... well... I accidentally shot a lizard... yes dumb *** n00b move I know but hey accidents happen. The warrior starts cursing me out calling me an idiot. We all had to zone and when I got on the other side of the gate I apologized for messing up and then I said I was having no fun at all in the party. I didnt point fingers or say why I just said that i wasnt having fun and that this was a game I play to enjoy and unwind and that if Im not having fun I shouldnt have to play in a pt. I know I messed up but nobody died except my WHM who suicided when I told her I was going to leave pt so she could bloodport. Should you remain in a party just because its polite? IF youre not having fun ? Because I was having no fun at all... in fact it was irritating me. I thought I did the right thing in leaving before I popped off and became rude. Later that night I got another party the people were fun and funny and while not quite as good of players as the first party it was a TON more fun and I ended up in that group for around 5 hours. Just kinda wondering your thoughts on group etiquette in a situation such as this. I intentionally didnt mention any names because all of the players involved were great players just a bit pushy for my tastes and I dont want this to become some sort of flame war.
yeah I was leveling thief yesterday with some peeps in my LS, though as a party we kind of sucked we were having a lot of fun. And thats waht this game is all about fun... not leveling :) so take pride in yourself. I get bossy as a thief for some reason too... and evil >:D but still its all about fun. whenever I get in a party thats all about being pro (and boring) I go emote crazy... to try and lighten up things. But still its not your responsiblity to be the clown. Go to where the fun is. I just wish they'd add new jobs to take to level at, cuz leveling 1-20 is so much more fun it seems.
Edited, Mon Oct 25 14:25:09 2004 by kriegonshiva
Edited, Mon Oct 25 14:25:09 2004 by kriegonshiva
I agree with you 100% Gravymonkey. You shouldn't stay in a pt if you are not having fun. I personally will stick it out for a bit to see if things get better but really bad groups tend to either get better or end all together relatively quickly, IMHO. I also tend not to like it when people tell other people how to play their job. I find myself doing it sometimes but I ask myself if its ******** or honest positive critizim. i.e. I was in a pt in valkrum where the thf (pt ldr) got it into her head that thf/war made great tanks. She was even using sneak attack while she held aggro. Those two things spurred me to mention that thf's aren't tanks; which spurred a discussion on it. I told her that thfs 'can' tank in valkrum but around lvl 25 expect to start dieing a lot if you don't change that attitude. Of course she didn't believe me. /em shrugs I didn't go on from there cause I figured she would learn the hard way sooner or later. That pt didn't end up lasting very long either.
Point being, no you shouldn't stick with a pt if you aren't having fun. I personally waste the time and accept the aggrivation until the pt ends. Though I shouldn't.
Point being, no you shouldn't stick with a pt if you aren't having fun. I personally waste the time and accept the aggrivation until the pt ends. Though I shouldn't.
49 posts
there's no way i'll stick in a party that makes me miserable just to get xp. this game is about fun, friendship, and community... not who can get to 75 in 3 hours.
I'm sure this has happened to everyone a lot. It doesn't matter how good the party's doing, if you have at least one member that's just a total wet blanket and complaining about everything, it would be hard to enjoy yourself (unless you're laughing at him).
This has happened to me many times, although I usually don't say I'm going to disband just because I'm not having fun. I usually just give them 20 minutes notice and say I have stuff to do, and take a short break from playing when I disband.
Although games these days are weird. Whenever I play CS, I usually end up getting pissed off and quitting, yet I thoroughly enjoy the game and play it when I have an urge.
This has happened to me many times, although I usually don't say I'm going to disband just because I'm not having fun. I usually just give them 20 minutes notice and say I have stuff to do, and take a short break from playing when I disband.
Although games these days are weird. Whenever I play CS, I usually end up getting pissed off and quitting, yet I thoroughly enjoy the game and play it when I have an urge.
Silly Vaxx, Socom owns Counterstrike. lol
But yeah I leave PTs when they stop being fun. AKA People ***** at me for not refreshing them the instant their Refresh please macro flashes. (Folks its a 5 second casting time plus another 15-18 seconds cool down time, so If I delay the refresh for the final enfeeble and maybe a dispel then begin the refresh cycle again, youre looking at a minor delay. Also its 3mp/5sec. If i delay you 10 seconds, youre missing 6mp. Whoop dee doo. That aint even a cure-1. Nor does a mere cure-1 do much in 50+ XP PTs.) Thank you, my ranting is done.
But yeah I leave PTs when they stop being fun. AKA People ***** at me for not refreshing them the instant their Refresh please macro flashes. (Folks its a 5 second casting time plus another 15-18 seconds cool down time, so If I delay the refresh for the final enfeeble and maybe a dispel then begin the refresh cycle again, youre looking at a minor delay. Also its 3mp/5sec. If i delay you 10 seconds, youre missing 6mp. Whoop dee doo. That aint even a cure-1. Nor does a mere cure-1 do much in 50+ XP PTs.) Thank you, my ranting is done.
I leave parties that have people complaining much faster than I will leave a party because of slow exp. In fact just this past Friday I was leveling my BLM in qufim. I was in this party and it started it out badly, first someone aggroed a dancing weapon and at a lvl 19 party all other decide to try to fight it instead of zone. So I tried to tell them, but noone listened and they started fighting it, I had to try to help and started casting even though I knew it meant death, but after 3 members died I ran the other way and casted warp. Well 4 members out of 6 died before we even started lvling. Now we get to the lake, I tell everyone at 1900 we must get to the center of the lake and pull snippers with ranged attack. Well 1900 rolls around and myself and one of my friends, the RDM go to the lake, and yell for the rest to come, they engage another snipper, so I run back out and help them kill it, and then dash back to the lake. They engage yet another snipper, this time my friend and I are aying they arent going to make it in time and to bring it to the lake, but noone listens. After that they come to the lake, right as they are about to enter a banshee pops and kills one instantly, down goes another, once again I cast warp. My friend and the whm make it safely to the tower, but the other 3 die. Daytime again regrouped, back to the lake. Now they are running around like madmen attacking everything, which is ok, but they werent watching for mages mp. We were all low and kept spamming our mp amount, but they decide to attack a worm and one of them dies. We get a raise and decide to find a new place to lvl, we get a good camp closer to tower where you can safely stay all night. We get things rocking chaining very well, I went from 19-22 in that party and now it is getting late, im getting tired, but noone wants me to leave, so I decide to stay. Im watching my magic damage and blizzard is doing about 50hp and thunder about 90-100. They keep doing the SC without any warning or TP notifications and I hit MB a couple times and it was doing Blizz for about 80. Now im thinking no warning for SC, even though I have asked them, thunder without MB is doing 90-100, so I stop worrying about MB and just nuke the crap out the snipes. Given with snipes as BLM I am pretty much the one killing these things fast enough for su to chain. All the sudden these people who would not listen earlier and were getting aggroed constantly start yelling at me for not doing MB, I try to explain my point about thunder damage compared to MB of blizz, but yet they keep giving no notice for SC and then chewing me out for no MB. So finally got sick of it and left, told them they could find a blm who could do MB with no notice. Was I justified there for leaving?, even if I am not, I would still do it again.
Ahhhh poor Gravy - that's cuz ppl don't understand the "new" SMN. My RL hubby plays an aggressive SMN - you should talk to him - Lasher. He likes to join in the Melee, Bloodpact, MB, self skill-chain, etc. And it freaks some people out when he refuses to be the "main healer" and prefers to be a Damage Dealer. It also freaks his PT out when he doesn't sit down. He rarely sits down - he's got auto-refresh. So when stacked with a RDM's Refresh (Lasher's SMN 52) he doesn't sit down as often.
If you are not having fun, and if people are not willing to work with you and how you play your class, I think it's time to go. Just simply say, "I'm sorry I don't think I can work well in this PT, as we play differently" and quietly ask to be replaced. I don't think you do, but just try not to insult people by calling them n00bs and what not - it's not nice, and will make an ugly situation worse...
Being a WHM and EVERYBODY knows (except for the n00bs in the Dunes who thinks my job is to raise and p-lvl XD)what I'm suppose to do...so I rarely get into an uncomfortable situation. (although I do freak people out when I Flash in attempt to give my NIN tank time to Utsusemi)
This is suppose to be a game - an escape, if you will from your office, your RL, your powerless, magicless boring world. For me, its all about making good friends thru PTs and LSs, growing stronger together, make money in the strangest way possible, to enjoy the silly converations I have with people I've never met, and basically have the chance to be able to control my life better than my RL. If it becomes as stressful and unhappy, then take a break, by all means.
I gotta see you ingame one of these days!!
If you are not having fun, and if people are not willing to work with you and how you play your class, I think it's time to go. Just simply say, "I'm sorry I don't think I can work well in this PT, as we play differently" and quietly ask to be replaced. I don't think you do, but just try not to insult people by calling them n00bs and what not - it's not nice, and will make an ugly situation worse...
Being a WHM and EVERYBODY knows (except for the n00bs in the Dunes who thinks my job is to raise and p-lvl XD)what I'm suppose to do...so I rarely get into an uncomfortable situation. (although I do freak people out when I Flash in attempt to give my NIN tank time to Utsusemi)
This is suppose to be a game - an escape, if you will from your office, your RL, your powerless, magicless boring world. For me, its all about making good friends thru PTs and LSs, growing stronger together, make money in the strangest way possible, to enjoy the silly converations I have with people I've never met, and basically have the chance to be able to control my life better than my RL. If it becomes as stressful and unhappy, then take a break, by all means.
I gotta see you ingame one of these days!!
Whats the point in playing if your not having fun?
I would give notice, and politley leave.
I would much rather have slower exp in a fun party then faster exp in a snobby party (although both is always nice).
I see people just say "i have to go thnx for party" and disband from time to time, being polite and giving notice is a huge step up from some no matter the reason.
I would give notice, and politley leave.
I would much rather have slower exp in a fun party then faster exp in a snobby party (although both is always nice).
I see people just say "i have to go thnx for party" and disband from time to time, being polite and giving notice is a huge step up from some no matter the reason.
I actually left a pt for the first time the other day before we even started to really xp because of the people in it, I can totally understand how you feel. Sometimes its just not worth being miserable just to get to the next level. Its hard though when most of the pts in certain well known areas end up being full of people that can't seem to show anyone else the slightest bit of decency /sigh
I have yet to leave a party for that reason-- I have yet to become entangled with such folk, in fact. Lucky me... I rarely meet idiots in party, and when I have, usually it's THEY who leave.
I guess I'm just fated to land on my feet.
I guess I'm just fated to land on my feet.
It's perfectly okay to leave a group if they're getting on your nerves.
I've got a qufim example!
It was my first actual time in Qufim this past saturday. I was working up my RDM 21, and i had started seeking at lower jeuno. anyway, get to qufim, get in a pty that's just starting. after about 30 minutes, with only 4 of us, the leader says, "Let's go find camp and we'll find the rest when we get there" No prblems form me, so we start through the tunnel and there in outr way is a dancing weapon. >_< So i decide to wait it out, see wher eit goes and hope to get aroudn it when all of asudden the PT leader hits herself with a sneak spell! I say "They aggro to magic!" but it's too late, adn the weapon's on her. she dies, and i manage to get out of there. party disbands, and i head back into Qufim on my own, still seeking. welll i got a pty that was camped over by the tower, so i duck and weave my way there, avoiding everything, since it's all IT to me still, and i managed to make it there alive.
Now, i understand RDMs are able to be main healer, but WHMs are better at it. but, nevertheless, i get wrangled into being main healer. no problem, i just drop cure2s whhen the tank gets into the yellow, sinc ethe other 2 mges have WHM subbes to, they're tossing cures as well. well after an hour or so (Still no level) i decide to step up into the melee, since i'm barely using half my MP inthe fight, with the other two mages doing all the stuff i normally do as a RDM (enfeebles), and with me not really having to Cure all that much, i get off my **** and start meeleing, which as far as i know is normal operating procedure for redmages... why else do they give us swords?
anyway after about 4 fights the THF starts griping about how if i'm main healer, i shouldn't be meeling and what not. of course her reasoning for telling me how to play is that he's got anotherjob at lvl 50, so she knows everything >_<
my defense consisted of the fact that the toher mages were healing as well, and the combats were goign faster with me getting in on the melee. normally, if the mob dies faster, it means you cna pull another one faster, meaing more xpcoming in at a higher rate. after the pty agreed with me, the THF kept sending me /tells abotu how i didn't meed to be meeling. after about 15 minutes of this, i apologized to the PT and left.
maybe i shouldn't have left, but i don't appreciate being TOLD how to play a game where i get to make my own decisions. i play my game how i want, anf if you don't liek it, don't pty with me. that's why i picked RDM. if needs be i can take care of myself. i like being in good ptys, where everyon gets along and the jokes fly more ofthen than the spells do. if a pt leader laughs at my jokes, i'll follow them into ifrit's cauldron of they ask nicely. (I'll still die very quickly, but what's a few hundred xp?
I've got a qufim example!
It was my first actual time in Qufim this past saturday. I was working up my RDM 21, and i had started seeking at lower jeuno. anyway, get to qufim, get in a pty that's just starting. after about 30 minutes, with only 4 of us, the leader says, "Let's go find camp and we'll find the rest when we get there" No prblems form me, so we start through the tunnel and there in outr way is a dancing weapon. >_< So i decide to wait it out, see wher eit goes and hope to get aroudn it when all of asudden the PT leader hits herself with a sneak spell! I say "They aggro to magic!" but it's too late, adn the weapon's on her. she dies, and i manage to get out of there. party disbands, and i head back into Qufim on my own, still seeking. welll i got a pty that was camped over by the tower, so i duck and weave my way there, avoiding everything, since it's all IT to me still, and i managed to make it there alive.
Now, i understand RDMs are able to be main healer, but WHMs are better at it. but, nevertheless, i get wrangled into being main healer. no problem, i just drop cure2s whhen the tank gets into the yellow, sinc ethe other 2 mges have WHM subbes to, they're tossing cures as well. well after an hour or so (Still no level) i decide to step up into the melee, since i'm barely using half my MP inthe fight, with the other two mages doing all the stuff i normally do as a RDM (enfeebles), and with me not really having to Cure all that much, i get off my **** and start meeleing, which as far as i know is normal operating procedure for redmages... why else do they give us swords?
anyway after about 4 fights the THF starts griping about how if i'm main healer, i shouldn't be meeling and what not. of course her reasoning for telling me how to play is that he's got anotherjob at lvl 50, so she knows everything >_<
my defense consisted of the fact that the toher mages were healing as well, and the combats were goign faster with me getting in on the melee. normally, if the mob dies faster, it means you cna pull another one faster, meaing more xpcoming in at a higher rate. after the pty agreed with me, the THF kept sending me /tells abotu how i didn't meed to be meeling. after about 15 minutes of this, i apologized to the PT and left.
maybe i shouldn't have left, but i don't appreciate being TOLD how to play a game where i get to make my own decisions. i play my game how i want, anf if you don't liek it, don't pty with me. that's why i picked RDM. if needs be i can take care of myself. i like being in good ptys, where everyon gets along and the jokes fly more ofthen than the spells do. if a pt leader laughs at my jokes, i'll follow them into ifrit's cauldron of they ask nicely. (I'll still die very quickly, but what's a few hundred xp?
i left a group last night because the blm and rdm would heal me when i got aggro as a whm so i had to stop healing completly because i had only 36 hp in yhotar jungle and couldnt afford another hit. i got tells from the leader afterwords saying mean things.
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