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#1 Jan 27 2010 at 10:14 AM Rating: Excellent
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This article was linked from Penny Arcade this morning.

A prisoner, duly locked up for murder, has been forbidden to play D&D and his materials have been confiscated. No big deal, I guess; he's in prison, after all, so it's their rules.

But the reasons given struck me as being a bit Jack Thompson-esque:

Quote:
Prison officials enacted the ban in 2004 after an inmate sent an anonymous letter expressing concern about Singer and three other inmates forming a "gang" focused around playing the game.

Singer was told by prison officials that he could not keep the materials because Dungeons & Dragons "promotes fantasy role playing, competitive hostility, violence, addictive escape behaviors, and possible gambling," according to the ruling. The prison later developed a more comprehensive policy against all types of fantasy games, the court said.


NO ROLE PLAYING!

But seriously... gambling? Violence? I've never seen anyone get violent over a D&D game.
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#2 Jan 27 2010 at 10:17 AM Rating: Excellent
Samira wrote:
But seriously... gambling? Violence? I've never seen anyone get violent over a D&D game.


That's because you're not hard core, Samy.
#3 Jan 27 2010 at 10:22 AM Rating: Excellent
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When all you've got is your level 7 elf rogue with a cloak of shadow and a +3 skill bow, it's worth protecting. Even if that means shanking the dungeon master.
#4 Jan 27 2010 at 10:27 AM Rating: Excellent
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He might use his blacksmithing non-weapon proficiency to create a shiv. You ever stop to think of that?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5 Jan 27 2010 at 10:28 AM Rating: Excellent
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Bardalicious wrote:
When all you've got is your level 7 elf rogue with a cloak of shadow and a +3 skill bow, it's worth protecting. Even if that means shanking the dungeon master.

*Shank* "Lightning bolt!"
*Shank* "Lightning bolt!"
*Shank* "Lightning bolt!"
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#6 Jan 27 2010 at 10:32 AM Rating: Decent
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People in prison should be suffering, not escaping into a far away land.

Next they'll be giving them WoW accounts.
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About a heaven in Alberta
Where they've got all hell for a basement"

#7 Jan 27 2010 at 10:34 AM Rating: Excellent
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You are in a locked cell. A narrow bed is bolted to the south wall. A metal toilet is bolted to the east wall. The north wall is made of sturdy bars.

....


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#8 Jan 27 2010 at 10:37 AM Rating: Excellent
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> EXAMINE BED
> MOVE MATTRESS
> GET SHANK
> GET CIGARETTES
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#9 Jan 27 2010 at 10:38 AM Rating: Excellent
Samira wrote:
You are in a locked cell. A narrow bed is bolted to the south wall. A metal toilet is bolted to the east wall. The north wall is made of sturdy bars.

....


An ogre stands guard just three feet away. You have in your possession some elastic string from a pair of underpants and a napkin.

...


#10 Jan 27 2010 at 10:45 AM Rating: Excellent
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You are in the a public shower. Water rains down on you from the showerhead on the North wall. To the East and West stand other inmates. You cannot see anything through the steam to the South. The soap is on the floor directly beside your left foot.
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About a heaven in Alberta
Where they've got all hell for a basement"

#11 Jan 27 2010 at 10:55 AM Rating: Decent
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Iamadam the Prohpet wrote:
People in prison should be suffering, not escaping into a far away land.

Shit, when I was in jail we had all the premium movie channels. Skinemax in a block with five inmates, anyone?
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#12 Jan 27 2010 at 11:00 AM Rating: Excellent
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EVIDENCE!!!!

Nexa
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“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
#13 Jan 27 2010 at 11:00 AM Rating: Good
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"After all, punishment is a fundamental aspect of imprisonment"
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#14 Jan 27 2010 at 11:15 AM Rating: Excellent
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Timelordwho wrote:
"After all, punishment is a fundamental aspect of imprisonment"


So let one of the sadistic guards (stock character, just grab one out of Casting) be the dungeon master.

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#15 Jan 27 2010 at 11:18 AM Rating: Excellent
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Iamadam the Prohpet wrote:
You are in the a public shower. Water rains down on you from the showerhead on the North wall. To the East and West stand other inmates. You cannot see anything through the steam to the South. The soap is on the floor directly beside your left foot.

It is pitch black. You are likely to be ***-raped by a grue.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#16 Jan 27 2010 at 11:21 AM Rating: Excellent
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Oh ****, Joph. You just cracked my **** up.
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#17 Jan 27 2010 at 11:29 AM Rating: Good
Your prison ***** is glowing blue!

Uh, let me try that again: Your prison ***** is blowing glue!
#18 Jan 27 2010 at 12:02 PM Rating: Excellent
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Does xyzzy do anything in prison?
#19 Jan 27 2010 at 12:31 PM Rating: Good
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The pencils and paper could cause serious damage when the inevitable loot drama occurs.
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#20 Jan 27 2010 at 12:38 PM Rating: Good
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Timelordwho wrote:
The pencils and paper could cause serious damage when the inevitable loot drama occurs.
The pencils, sure. But death by paper cuts?
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#21 Jan 27 2010 at 12:51 PM Rating: Excellent
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Uglysasquatch, Mercenary Major wrote:
Timelordwho wrote:
The pencils and paper could cause serious damage when the inevitable loot drama occurs.
The pencils, sure. But death by paper cuts?


If you can knock them for out for about an hour you can kill them with paper cuts.
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#22 Jan 27 2010 at 1:04 PM Rating: Good
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Debalic wrote:
Shit, when I was in jail we had all the premium movie channels. Skinemax in a block with five inmates, anyone?
Prison's no jail.
#23 Jan 27 2010 at 1:14 PM Rating: Good
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Yay for all the Zork references!
#24 Jan 27 2010 at 3:02 PM Rating: Good
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All I can think of is the X-Files episode "Unusual Suspects" where you a scene starts with Langley all poker-faced trying to challenge someone to bet against him in what seems to be a poker game, taunting them when they don't ("C'mon! My diaper-wearing granny would bet $50!") and finally finding someone who will, at which point we get, "Elron the Druid bets $50. Cash only, Elron. We don't take no checks from the Bank of Middle Earth. C'mon, natural 20. Daddy needs a new Sword of Wounding!" as the scene pans out to a D&D game in progress.
#25 Jan 27 2010 at 3:36 PM Rating: Excellent
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Thinking about it, taking away their materials would encourage larping, which is far more dangerous methinks.

Edited, Jan 27th 2010 3:37pm by Allegory
#26 Jan 27 2010 at 4:00 PM Rating: Good
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Ambrya wrote:
All I can think of is the X-Files episode "Unusual Suspects" where you a scene starts with Langley all poker-faced trying to challenge someone to bet against him in what seems to be a poker game, taunting them when they don't ("C'mon! My diaper-wearing granny would bet $50!") and finally finding someone who will, at which point we get, "Elron the Druid bets $50. Cash only, Elron. We don't take no checks from the Bank of Middle Earth. C'mon, natural 20. Daddy needs a new Sword of Wounding!" as the scene pans out to a D&D game in progress.
Hearts for the X-Files. Smiley: inlove

Edited, Jan 27th 2010 4:03pm by Atomicflea
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