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Teh Hobbitz - KastingFollow

#1 Jan 25 2010 at 4:23 PM Rating: Excellent
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Been keeping a loose eye on theonering.net and other fan-sites about who will play whom in the forthcoming "Hobbit" movies.

I thought I'd consider a more imaginative casting:

Bilbo Baggins: Sly Stallone is a shoe-in
Gandalf: Joe Pesci (Okay Okay, They fUck you with the ring. They lure you into an adventure then they fUck you with the ring.)
Thorin Oakenshield: Verne Troyer (What? Heightists!)
Oin son of Gloin: Leonardo di Caprio
Elrond: Brian Blessed
Gollum: Kelsey Grammar

Any other mis-casting suggestion?
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#2 Jan 25 2010 at 4:26 PM Rating: Excellent
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Nobby wrote:
Been keeping a loose eye on theonering.net and other fan-sites about who will play whom in the forthcoming "Hobbit" movies.

I thought I'd consider a more imaginative casting:

Bilbo Baggins: Sly Stallone is a shoe-in
Gandalf: Joe Pesci (Okay Okay, They fUck you with the ring. They lure you into an adventure then they fUck you with the ring.)
Thorin Oakenshield: Verne Troyer (What? Heightists!)
Oin son of Gloin: Leonardo di Caprio
Elrond: Brian Blessed
Gollum: Kelsey Grammar

Any other mis-casting suggestion?


Kelly Osborne as Arwen.

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#3 Jan 25 2010 at 4:31 PM Rating: Good
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Samira wrote:
Kelly Osborne as Arwen.


I was referring to "The Hobbit", not "The LoTR", silly mare. Try to keep up.

(And I had Roseanne Barr as Arwen, with Madonna as Galadriel and Bob 'oskins as Elrond)
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#4 Jan 25 2010 at 4:35 PM Rating: Excellent
Shaquille o'neal should be Gandalf. He's got experience, after playing Kazaam.
#5 Jan 25 2010 at 4:37 PM Rating: Good
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Belkira the Tulip wrote:
Shaquille o'neal should be Gandalf. He's got experience, after playing Kazaam.
Hell Yeah!

And Ice-T as Bard the archer! :-)
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#6 Jan 25 2010 at 4:42 PM Rating: Good
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Silly, everyone knows that in middle earth, black people can only be evil.
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#7 Jan 25 2010 at 4:43 PM Rating: Good
Wait, it's going to be in two parts? Oh, that's not strawberry milkshake. It's just blood in the milk.

My mis-casting suggestion has to be Stephen Fry as the voice of Smaug.
#8 Jan 25 2010 at 4:45 PM Rating: Excellent
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Kavekk the Ludicrous wrote:
Wait, it's going to be in two parts? Oh, that's not strawberry milkshake. It's just blood in the milk.

My mis-casting suggestion has to be Stephen Fry as the voice of Smaug.
How, pray, could Mr Fry be mis-cast for any role?
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#9 Jan 25 2010 at 4:47 PM Rating: Good
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Dr. Phil as Beorn the Berzerker
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#10 Jan 25 2010 at 4:55 PM Rating: Excellent
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FINE, then. I admit it's been a while since I've ready The Hobbitt.

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#11 Jan 25 2010 at 8:28 PM Rating: Excellent
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The entire book reminded me of being trapped in Runnyeye in EQ1.

/shudder
#12 Jan 25 2010 at 9:01 PM Rating: Good
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Steve Buscemi as Gollum...

...no, wait, that actually kinda works. Nevermind.
#13 Jan 25 2010 at 10:03 PM Rating: Good
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Sarah Palin as Bard. She can already shoot a gun, she should be able to handle a bow.
#14 Jan 25 2010 at 10:06 PM Rating: Good
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Steven Hawking as the voice of Smaug.
Michael Phelps as Gollum.
#15 Jan 25 2010 at 10:25 PM Rating: Good
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Ambrya wrote:
Steve Buscemi as Gollum...

...no, wait, that actually kinda works. Nevermind.

Hush, Steve Buscemi is one of my film actor sex fantasy crushes. Yeah I know, I'm weird. I just have this teeth fetish.
#16 Jan 26 2010 at 8:03 AM Rating: Decent
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Aripyanfar wrote:
Ambrya wrote:
Steve Buscemi as Gollum...

...no, wait, that actually kinda works. Nevermind.

Hush, Steve Buscemi is one of my film actor sex fantasy crushes. Yeah I know, I'm weird. I just have this teeth fetish.


On a related note, I've found that I would not be a good vampire because I don't really like the taste of blood.
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#17 Jan 26 2010 at 8:18 AM Rating: Good
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I don't think Oin is the son of Gloin.
#18 Jan 26 2010 at 8:20 AM Rating: Excellent
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Ricky Gervais should play Bilbo.
#19 Jan 26 2010 at 8:27 AM Rating: Excellent
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I thought Gimli was the son of Gloin....
#20 Jan 26 2010 at 9:50 AM Rating: Good
AshOnMyTomatoes wrote:
Ricky Gervais should play Bilbo.


I think Ricky Gervais would be better served as an elf.
#21 Jan 26 2010 at 9:52 AM Rating: Excellent
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Belkira the Tulip wrote:
AshOnMyTomatoes wrote:
Ricky Gervais should play Bilbo.


I think Ricky Gervais would be better served as an elf.


And then Stephen Merchant could play Bilbo.

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#22 Jan 26 2010 at 1:56 PM Rating: Good
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Donald Trump as Smaug, "Bard ... You're fired (queue CGI dragonfire)"

Then again, Donald as anyone in this or pretty much any movie is a miscasting.

Edited, Jan 26th 2010 12:58pm by baelnic
#23 Jan 26 2010 at 8:24 PM Rating: Good
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How about Donald as the dragon's treasure hoard? (For some reason when I try to use the dragon's name it runs into the word filter.)
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