Schadenfreude und auf weidersehenFollow

A final story:
I know some among you would gleefully chuckle and perhaps even joyfully dance at my misfortune at the hands of our president, Barack Hussein Obama, but I have woeful tale to tell.

As some of you may know I explored the possibility of going into private military contract work. That has blossomed into a job offer which I thoughtfully examined and then accepted. This entails much training and repolishing of old skills which have languished during my lengthy sojourn in the HEMS and oil fields, some of which is taking me around the country to various locations to practice in realistic settings before I go to the real thing.

During the course of my adventures in Africa this past year I built up quite a number of air miles which to date had not produced the vaunted Willy Wonka golden ticket to business or first class from economy. Needless to say, I dreamed of one day handing my lowly cattle class ticket to the agent who would smile beneficently at me, slide my it into the boarding pass reader and produce a lustrous upgrade to travelin' in high cotton. Well, this day finally arrived last week when I checked in and I was told my flight to... umm, nevermind where, would be a comped first class ticket on an B777! Wow, was I ever excited! The last time I rode first class was on my way back from Saudi Arabia after Desert Storm. As nice as that was, it didn't include all the amenities and bennies that riding up front includes when you pay for the ticket yourself. This time I'd get the whole package: champagne, chocolate covered strawberries, four high quality wines to imbibe during my evening meal, and even dulche de leche ice cream for desert.

So I arrived prepped and ready to go to San Francisco from Modesto, Cali, plenty early on my little puddle jumper, from which I would transfer to the major carrier for the main leg of my flight esconsed in Corinthian leather and surrounded by a bevy of beautiful flight attendants eager to satisfy my every need and desire. I passed through screening and sat impatiently waiting for the flight to be called.

Time passes.

More time passes.

Finally, as I check my watch for the 78th time, a ticket agent comes out and announces Air Force 1 made an unscheduled stop in the Bay and all incoming aircraft were on ground hold. Whaaaaaa?!? But I have a plane to catch that is holding a luxurious and fullly reclining seat for me and I can only make my connection if we leave in the next 15 minutes!

Time passes. Slowly.

15 minutes comes and goes. Multiply that by eight.
/sigh
We receive word we have been release and may board the aircraft. I glumly stalk out to the little commuter and sit despondent in seat 13B, right next to a chatty businessman who really would like to tell me about something that I have zero interest in but sounds like a grease fitting for outdated washing machines or whatnot.
/double deep sigh
I arrive plenty late, go to the counter and ask for a new flight to... some place I'm not supposed to talk about and get my new airline ticket-- in economy class immediately ahead of the bathrooms.
/cry
I swear I won't vote for Obama next election even if he turns the economy around, discovers a cure for cancer and the common cold, and invents an engine that runs on ordinary tap water.

Totem

PS: I suspect I will be seeing less and less of you guys for the foreseeable future. My life is taking me in new directions and internet access and time are becoming increasingly more valuable. Arguing with, teasing, and tweaking the delicately sensitive noses of many of you has been a very enjoyable pastime for the previous, what, 10+ years and I expect I'll miss that aspect of digital life. I have met some of you and despite philosophical and political differences, found each to be enjoyable company. Naming particular names would inevitably offend some because I would unwittingly omit someone, but suffice it to say I truly consider this board and its' inhabitants my friends. Thank you for putting up with my BS, faux racism, and idiocy. I wish you well.
Ciao.

Someone bottom line this for me?

He's got a new, spiffy job that will keep him away from the internet.


Oh, and he still hates Obama.

Ah. Toodles.

Back atcha, big guy. Be safe.

Edited to add: oh yeah! Ha-ha! at AF1 making you miss your first class accommodations. Only fitting, really.



Edited, Nov 10th 2009 6:42am by Samira

Take it easy Totem...don't let the man get ya down.

I thought you were flying Air America-style black ops in Afghanistan?

Whatever, dude, see ya whenever.

Dey always comes back

Later toUtem

Fly safe, you capitalist swine.