Someone should've told me URDOINITWRONG!Follow

So, today I get an email from the ubiquitous annoying distant relation with a CC: list ten miles long who feels the need to forward every cutesy little mass email and virus scare that comes her way. The one for whom I have a filter set up to send straight to my junk-mail folder. Nonetheless, I feel obliged to check it once in a while to make sure nothing important like birth or death announcements or other relevant family news actually managed to work its way in (it happened--once.)

The title (all in caps, naturally) is "SOMEBODY'S RAISING THEIR KID RIGHT." The body is, predictably, in extra-big bold font.

And here's the content:



Now, forget for a moment that this is almost certainly an urban myth penned by some fundie zealot with too much time on his hands and too great an appreciation for what can only charitably be called "his wit" by the most eager stretch of a willing imagination. The first thought that occurred to me (probably because my kid is approaching the age where this will be an issue) was that if my kid ever was such a smart-*** to a teacher--regardless of whether or not he was in the "right"--he'd be grounded for a month.

So heedlessly, I hit "reply to all" with the following.



I'm gonna catch a lot of shit from my family for a while.

Edited, Sep 3rd 2009 1:20pm by Ambrya

I take much joy in "breaking" the petitions that are sent to me from various relatives and do-gooders by deleting them.

MUCH joy.

Teachers can crap on anyone's religion in a school setting in front of their entire classroom and you're concerned that the little girl wasn't being polite?

You shouldn't be able to do it all. But way to go with your bad self, you go girlfriend.

Neph knows that email spam is SERIOUS BIZNESS!

Hahaha, I thought it was funny. I would have sent around "alternate" endings.

Little Girl: "Tommy, have you seen my mommy?"

Tommy: "Yesssss!"

Little Girl: "Have you seen my daddy?"

Tommy: "Um... no?"

Little Girl: "That's because he's in jail. Thanks for reminding me, Tommy! THERE IS NO GOD!"


-

Little Girl: "Tommy, did you see the sun?"

Tommy: "Nope."

Little Girl: "Tommy, did you see the sky?"

Tommy: "Uh-uh."

Little Girl: "Christ, Tommy, what's wrong with you?"

Tommy: "I'm blind! What's your excuse for being a *****?"

-

Teacher: "Tommy, do you see the grass outside?"

Tommy: "Yes."

Teacher: "Tommy, normally I'd just tell you how that grass is actually genetically modified from an original strain of bermuda grass that comes from the Caribbean. It was imported to the US, where growers noticed its popularity and thus purposefully cross-bred it with other breeds to be more resistant. Through hundreds of generations of selective breeding, this grass gained characteristics that completely set it apart from the original strain. It 'evolved' through selective breeding! Unfortunately, the Republican party in Congress slashed funding and the local legislature makes it so I need to teach alternate theories as well as scientific facts like the one I just said. Yes, even if there is no science to back them up!"

Tommy: "Um... so what is the best alternate theory?"

Teacher: "Tommy, have you heard of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?"

Sure it did. Tommy and LITTLE GIRL are in the same class with Little Johnny.

Only if your elders aren't Jews, Blacks, Mexicuns, Poles, French, Chinamen, etc. Or so my Sunday school teacher taught me.

Edited, Sep 3rd 2009 3:17pm by baelnic

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the
teacher?

TOMMY: Yes

LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain?

TOMMY: No

LITTLE GIRL: Then according to what we
were taught today in school, she possibly
may not even have one!

GOD: NOW, YOUNG LADY, THAT IS NOT A VERY NICE THING TO SAY ABOUT YOUR TEACHER. YOU ARE BEING UNBEARABLY PRECOCIOUS, YOU KNOW. I'LL HAVE TO PUNISH THIS, I AM AFRAID.

Exeunt LITTLE GIRL, pursued by a bear.

Good thing he doesn't exist or we'd be f*cked.

Okay.

URDOINITWRONG

A child should not be expected to just capitulate with everything a teacher tells him, especially when it is something ridiculously fucking stupid. A teacher relying on sensation to prove existential status deserves a rebuke, preferably strongly worded, and preferably from both children and adults laughing at him/her. Agreeing that some acquaintance is foolish and not pressing the issue is fine; doing the same with a person who is employed to teach your children good thinking skills is not.

***



Elders are free to earn respect as anyone else is.

Edited, Sep 3rd 2009 7:18pm by Pensive

Ironic.

Yuh-huh, whatever. If I had premium, you'd be getting the rolleyes smiley now.

And that, ladies and gentleman, concludes our amusing little side-trip to Pensive's happy-hippy little la-la land where no authority structure exists and everyone can just do whatever they want with no consequences. ::yawn::



Edited, Sep 3rd 2009 4:57pm by Ambrya

I'm sorry? Are you @#%^ing daft woman!?

I have been arguing that stupid teachers deserve to "own their words" and accept responsibility for the stupid sh*t that they say, arguments that you have gleefully and blindly supported in many other discussions, and you abstract from that that I want a world free of consequences?

Not by any intelligent appraisal of the argument could someone deduce that conclusion. Honestly, and in a nice twist of poeticism, the only way I think that you could deduce such a conclusion is if you were engaging in the exact same psychological deflection and assertion of power, trying desperately to assure yourself that your ideals are beyond reproach, as when you will do as you have promised in disciplining any child of yours for "disrespecting" an authority figure. I didn't actually think I'd get a nice example of how stupid an adult can be when confronted with something like that, but I'll take it.

If I'm telling someone that the sky is made of cheese, and I'm in a position of authority, precisely because I am in a position of authority, and as such can directly influence and mold the minds of my students, I don't need a polite and kind disagreement from the class; I would need some precocious kid to tell me that I'm full of sh*t, and if I cannot accept criticism and mend my pernicious dominion over the minds of the children, I need to be fired.

***



Suppose I'll explicate: anything that's not a personal attack really I have no problem with, and I'd have to try hard to view the article's example as a personal attack. It's a freaking joke that happens to touch on the problem of other minds and is an exceptionally awesome counterpoint to any argument from ignorance.

I've told some of my favorite professors in university, and even some really cool ones in highschool, that their conclusions or interpretations of works were "intellectually fraudulent." Most of them take it in stride and have no qualms with throwing it back; we tend to have excellent rapport.

Edited, Sep 3rd 2009 8:14pm by Pensive