My near disaster...Follow

So, Mr. Ambrya and I didn't watch the debate tonight because we went out on a date. My friend Katherine, who as an apprentice midwife is usually on-call to go to births, has the month off because her preceptor is on vacation. So for the very first time ever, Tristan went over to visit Katherine and her son on a playdate without me present. The only other time I've ever left him with anyone has been at his grandparent's house and then only for a couple hours at a time. This, however, was a whole afternoon and evening affair.

Let me preface this by saying that Katherine is an extremely diligent, conscientious and attentive mother and I had absolutely no worries about leaving Tristan with her, except for the normal reservations about leaving my kid with someone new for the first time ever. I could tell I was feeling a little anxious at this new situation, though, because as we drove past a park near her home that features a large pond, my brain went off into a horrible daydream/nightmare about Tristan falling into the pond and drowning while with Katherine (Thumb's recent family tragedy might have played a roll in this as well.)

Except for checking in once I actually restrained myself from pestering them. As the time for us to meet up and pick Tristan up neared, however, I get a call from Katherine telling us she's on her way to the rendezvous point and she mentions that she's got to tell me about the "little adventure" Tristan had today.

They went to the park (not the one with the pond near her house, but a different one alongside a river) and after swinging and playing on the slide and whatnot, were walking near the river visiting with the ducks and geese. Katherine had left her purse on a boulder, and Tristan was wanting to move on, so she half-turned away from him for all of a second to grab it. In that instant it took her to pivot, grab her purse, and turn back, my son (who had been standing only a foot away from her, well within arm's reach) made it to the water's edge and dove head-first into the river.

By the time Katherine ran into the water and grabbed him by the foot and pulled him out, he had been fully submerged for only a couple seconds. He gave her a startled look, spluttered, then promptly started grinning and laughing and trying to lunge out of her arms and back into the water. He continued to try to escape her grasp and run back into the water as she stripped off his wet clothes and wrapped him in the sweatshirt she'd had tied around her waist. Apparently he really, REALLY wanted to go swimming.

I've known my kid has no fear of water ever since the day in August when we were walking along the shore of Lake Michigan and he kept trying to let go of my hand and run out into the water, even though it was far too cold for swimming. But still, you'd think going head-first into a river would make him even just a LITTLE bit hesitant to try it again, but no. The child truly has no fear whatsoever.

I'm torn between absolute horror and reluctant hilarity, because I can all to well imagine the way he grinned and laughed as he tried to run back into the water. And I'm giving half-serious consideration to getting one of those toddler harness/leash things I've always disdained before, at least to use whenever there's a body of water less than half a mile away.
Tristan is perfectly fine. Katherine promptly took him home and dumped him in the bath to get the river water off him, but I do need to keep an eye out on his eyes to make sure he doesn't get an infection, and he had a little bit of a cough on the way home tonight I'll be paying attention to.

But despite that, something tells me I won't be sleeping well tonight. Or ever.

Yeah, I was planning to get him lessons next summer anyway, but we might step up that timeline. Mr. Ambrya actually works with a guy who teaches kids to swim as his other job, so he can at least give us referrals to other teachers, or possibly even do it himself.

Sounds like you should have watched the debate.

Our primary job as parents is simply to keep our children from committing suicide despite their best efforts. It's the only reason, evolutionarily, that we get bigger and whatnot. We're supposed to be smart enough and strong enough to keep them from sticking a fork in an electrical socket, jumping in a river, swallowing a marble, etc.

It's like working in an overnight mental facility on bed watch.

Nexa

Don't. Go with the swimming lessons.

Those harnesses are horrible. That's like keeping your kids on a leash. In the UK, I see plenty of people walking their kid with one of those, and it's almost surreal. I'm surprised it's not a breach of human rights or something. Just hold the kid by the hand, it's not that complicated.

Or just get a dog, seriously...

Isn't that normaly spelt with an X? Xavi.

Definately get a leash and swimming lessons.
Disdain them all you want but until your child will stop when you say so and stays close on your say so they will save lots of spills, chills, and anguish.

How can Lake Michigan be too cold to swim in in August? Too polluted, I understand, but too cold?

I'll have to try this, thanks for the tip.

Ok, I might get flamed cos I don't have a kid myself, but if you can't get your child to listen to you when you say "Stop!" in important situations, when are they ever going to listen to you? When they rebel at 13? When they do drugs at 16? And how long with you keep them on a leash? And what happens when you take it off?

I understand kids don't always listen, and they do their own thing, and it can be scary and frustrating, and borderline dangerous sometimes. But surely that's part of learning as a kid, isn't it? Putting them on a leash teaches nothing at all, and is somewhat objectifying. When I was young, if my dad shouted "Stop!", I would stop. Authority is something you need to develop within the relationship, and I can't see how the leash is a productive thing on the long-term.

Well, I might be talking out my *** again, and I respect that some parents might be so overwhelmed that they feel they have no option. But if the only way to keep your child from running away and juming in a lake/oncoming traffic is to have them on a leash, then something fundamental is not right.

My 2 euros.

Not even 17 months old yet.

Yup, swimming lessons ASAP.

My daughter has absolutely no fear. Hubby blames this on me since I was the adrenaline-rush junkie when we got married.

But like DSD said, it's so much better to have a child that is confident and respects their surroundings instead of one who is fearful of everything.

We use this with our (nearly) 3 year old.

Oddly the other day he started saying that "Sometimes, green means stop, and red means go". Don't be daft we said, its ALWAYS the other way around.

No, he said, and took us off to the strawberry patch that we've got going, and pointed at the green strawberry and said "sometimes green means STOP! and red means GO!"

Well that told us.........little smarty pants