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I rated you up for being uncharacteristically Shit.

uncharacteristically?

I thought this was somewhat amusing, for him.

And hear I thought Neph was a girl, all this time!

They just keep coming!

As I was waiting to load my groceries on to the checkout conveyor , a drunk standing ahead of me was intently watching the lady in front of him as she placed these items in front of the cashier.

* half-gallon of 2% milk,
* carton of eggs,
* quart of orange juice,
* head of romaine lettuce,
* 2 lb. Can of coffee, and
* 1 lb. Package of bacon.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, 'You must be single.'


The lady was a bit startled by this proclamation, but was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, as she was indeed single.



She looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped him off as to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said: 'Well, you know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?'








The drunk replied, 'Cause you're ugly.'

A quick look in my inbox reveals this :

Subject: From me to you

There were many, many times last year when I may have disturbed you, troubled you, pestered you, irritated you, bugged you, or got on your nerves with all the e-mails I send out. So today I just wanted to tell you...
Tough ****!
There are no changes scheduled for 2008

and this :

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. As he wondered
how the heck he would do it, he comes across an ad in the
newspaper for a



GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. 'Guaranteed. Yeah right!'
he thinks to himself. But desperate, he calls them and subscribes
to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.


The next day there's a knock at his door, and there stands a
voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young woman dressed in nothing
but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck. She
introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign says, 'If you can catch me, you can have me!'


Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later,


huffing and puffing, he finally catches and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, 'I like
the way this company does business!'


The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing
happens.


On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he
has lost 10 lbs. as promised. He calls the company and orders their
5-day/20 pound program.


The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most
stunning, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing
but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that says, 'If
you catch me, you can have me'


He's out the door like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it
takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every
cramp and wheeze.


For the next four days, the same routine happens and much to his
delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself and finds he has lost
another 20 lbs. as promised.


He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-
day/50 pound program. 'Are you sure?' asks the representative on
the phone, 'this is our most rigorous program.'


'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'


The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it, he
finds a muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink
running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,......'If I catch
you, you're mine.'

Not very good ...

I suggest Postini or GFI. We can get you a great deal.

No Country For Old Men is next on my list, but I still have time to swap it out with Ratatouille???

I was in that traffic jam that day. I contributed two gallons of gas.

Totem