A buddy of mine texted me on Thursday, asking if I had any plans for Friday night. Being the elite recluse that I am (in other words, no dating prospects) I told him I had no agenda for that evening, and asked what was up. Turns out his girlfriend was moving and he asked if I could assist. He claimed that she had told him that she had already moved everything except a few large items, couple beds, dressers, 2 entertainment centers, dining table, and a couch. He said that he estimated that it would take about an hour.
Being the nice guy that I am, the fact that he is one of my best buds, and also taking into account his girl is pretty hot with a brand new boob-job, I said that I would be there with bells on.
Work ran late, as I had to wait on a Qwest tech to look at a bonded T1 that we've been trying to get installed for the last month. I ended up not getting out of the office till about 6pm, I jumped on the motorcycle and buzzed on over to said girl's (we'll call her Jen) old place. I pull in to find my bud (let's say Jack) with the rented Uhaul already in place. Jen's sister is also in attendance (looking nothing like Jen, and probably bigger than me) and ready to aid. I walk into the joint with Jack, and immediately find a packed living room. By packed I mean tons of ****. Jen had claimed that she had been moving boxes of stuff all week and nothing was left except the big stuff. I walked into a living room with a coffee table, couch, recliner, 2 entertainment centers, and boxes upon boxes of crap. At this point I'm thinking "Well, it could be worse." It was.
I made my way into the kitchen, where the dining table and chairs were, along with another dresser, numerous boxes, and some large toy table thingie that I would have killed to have when I was a kid. At this point I'm still optimistic. I look over at Jack (the ladies were still outside) and as if he read my mind, which he probably had being as we'd known each other for going on 12 years, he shook his head with a disgusted look. We headed upstairs.
In the first bedroom, there was a queen size bed, dresser, some wicker couch, a gym set, entertainment center, and a large hope chest. Plus numerous boxes. The second bedroom contained another bed, dresser, computer desk, book shelf, and other boxes. The third bedroom contained more boxes, another entertainment center, another computer desk, and probably more Shit that I can't recall.
Jack had rented a 17 foot truck, as Jen had assured him it was going to be plenty big to make it in one trip. Needless to say, she was way off. I haven't even mentioned the garage full of crap yet, which I won't get into. We packed up the first truck and made it to her place, which was noticeably smaller than her prior establishment, and unloaded by 9pm. We were ready to head back for another round when we ran into a problem. The door for the Uhaul had come off it's track and we couldn't get it closed again. Long story short (ha-ha) we had to call the 24 hour assistance number, have a mechanic come out to fix the truck, and then make our way back for the second load. It was nearly 11:30pm by that point. We loaded up the truck again (still leaving some stuff behind) and made it to the new place to unload at 1am. Of couse the sprinklers are on at this point, complicating things, and everyone is thoroughly wiped out and not in the best of moods. It was 2:30pm by the time we finished unloading.
One other thing I will mention is that her new place, while nice, is a smaller 3 bedroom townhouse with no garage. By the time we were done, you could barely walk through the place. I have no idea how she is going to manage orgnaizing that joint without it looking like a flea market.
At this point, we of course we had to track down a gas station that was open that had diesel fuel, so we could refill the tank on the rental and avoid the $30 surcharge and $4 a gallon fee. I'm driving Jack's Lexus SUV in one direction, and he headed another both in search of a suitable service station. We finally found an open one, refilled, and dropped the truck off. We got back to his place at 3:30am.
After a brief venting session, where Jack apologized and where I told him it wasn't his fault, Jen was a typical woman, I jumped on the bike and headed home. He went upstairs to find Jen in his bed. Where she then asked...
"Are you mad?"
I do believe Jack is back on the market ladies.