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In Soviet Russia...Follow

#1 Aug 07 2007 at 9:44 AM Rating: Excellent
Liberal Conspiracy
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...the government tells YOU to ***** off!
The Daily Mail wrote:
Remember the mammoths, say the clean-cut organisers at the youth camp's mass wedding. "They became extinct because they did not have enough sex. That must not happen to Russia".

Obediently, couples move to a special section of dormitory tents arranged in a heart-shape and called the Love Oasis, where they can start procreating for the motherland.

With its relentlessly upbeat tone, bizarre ideas and tight control, it sounds like a weird indoctrination session for a phoney religious cult.

But this organisation - known as "Nashi", meaning "Ours" - is youth movement run by Vladimir Putin's Kremlin that has become a central part of Russian political life.

Nashi's annual camp, 200 miles outside Moscow, is attended by 10,000 uniformed youngsters and involves two weeks of lectures and physical fitness.

Attendance is monitored via compulsory electronic badges and anyone who misses three events is expelled. So are drinkers; alcohol is banned. But sex is encouraged, and condoms are nowhere on sale.
...Government officials say YOU'RE crazy!
The Chicago Tribune wrote:
Heavy sedatives keep Larisa Arap languishing in a woozy haze at a mental asylum, the victim not of a troubled mind, her family says, but of a Soviet-era practice that continues to muzzle and punish dissent in today's Russia.

Earlier this summer, Arap, an activist with former chess champion Garry Kasparov's opposition movement, co-wrote an article that alleged abusive practices at local psychiatric clinics. When Arap appeared at a Murmansk clinic to pick up a routine medical certificate July 5, a doctor called police and had her taken to a local asylum.

The doctors handling Arap's case have made it clear why they want her committed to a mental institution, says Arap's daughter, Taisiya.

"One of the doctors asked whether I thought it was normal to write such things," Taisiya Arap said. "She said, 'It's not possible to write such things. It's forbidden.'"
...Government demands proof from YOU!
The Trib again wrote:
Georgia claimed today that two Russian fighter jets invaded Georgian air space and fired a guided missile at a village not far from the country's capital, an allegation sure to worsen tense relations between the Kremlin and the former Soviet republic's U.S.-allied government.

Georgian radar detected the jets flying from the Russian republic of North Ossetia in the North Caucasus and over Georgia's border Monday evening, said Shota Utiashvili, a spokesman for the Georgian Interior Ministry, in a telephone interview as he inspected the crater from the missile, which did not explode.

A 1-ton, precision-guided missile was found buried 16 feet into the ground, about 30 yards from a house in the village of Tsitelubani, Utiashvili and other Georgian officials said. The village is about 37 miles northwest of Georgia's capital, Tbilisi. No one was hurt.

Russian authorities denied the allegation and challenged Georgian officials to back their assertions with proof.
A regular grab-bag of Russian fun to enjoy. You don't hear too much about the day-to-day in Russia these days although, under Putin, it's been sliding further and further into its Cold War costume. With all of our attention on the Middle East and Russia largely forgotten from the national conscious, imagine the surprise if and when the next US/Russian proxy war pops up someday.

Edited, Aug 7th 2007 12:45pm by Jophiel
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Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#2 Aug 07 2007 at 11:12 AM Rating: Good
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I kinda thought something was up when they started murdering reporters in cold blood a few years ago..

better watch your back Jophski Smiley: yikes
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#3 Aug 07 2007 at 11:44 AM Rating: Decent
Things have gotten better though. Twenty years ago, we would not even have heard about any of these stories. There was that thing called the "iron curtain" over there.
#4 Aug 07 2007 at 11:47 AM Rating: Default
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I was just saying the other day that Russia seems to be slipping back into it's Cold War ways...
#5 Aug 07 2007 at 11:57 AM Rating: Excellent
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shadomen wrote:
Things have gotten better though. Twenty years ago, we would not even have heard about any of these stories. There was that thing called the "iron curtain" over there.
True. But I'd argue that Russia was on a more democratic path fifteen years ago than it is today under Putin.

That's not to defend Yeltsin who dropped the ball on numerous occassions. But my point was that Russia was backsliding rather than moving forward.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#6 Aug 07 2007 at 12:22 PM Rating: Decent
Jophiel wrote:
shadomen wrote:
Things have gotten better though. Twenty years ago, we would not even have heard about any of these stories. There was that thing called the "iron curtain" over there.
True. But I'd argue that Russia was on a more democratic path fifteen years ago than it is today under Putin.

That's not to defend Yeltsin who dropped the ball on numerous occassions. But my point was that Russia was backsliding rather than moving forward.


/agreed

After the collapse of the corrupt communist system, Russia introduced capitalism, which led to more freedoms for the Russian freedom. Now, after 15 years or so, the Russian system of capitalism has become corrupt. It seems like a vicious circle.

I know it is more than that though. Like power hungry politicians who were part of the communist party changing laws so they can hold on to power longer, etc...
#7 Aug 07 2007 at 12:50 PM Rating: Good
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here's my old post about it http://www.allakhazam.com/forum.html?forum=4&mid=1160529549224758738 entitled "Those other crazy white people"

although it somehow ended up becoming an argument about Russian ethno-ancestral Teuton vs Slavic heritage Smiley: dubious
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#8 Aug 07 2007 at 12:53 PM Rating: Decent
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Things have gotten better though.


Not really, they're still ****** in the same ways they always have been, just by a different ****.
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Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#9 Aug 07 2007 at 12:58 PM Rating: Good
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Smasharoo wrote:

Things have gotten better though.


Not really, they're still @#%^ed in the same ways they always have been, just by a different ****.


What should you expect in a giant nation full of cold, athiestic, white people?
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#10 Aug 07 2007 at 1:04 PM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
But I'd argue that Russia was on a more democratic path fifteen years ago than it is today under Putin.


No, really? Putin, who threatened to do away with the Duma which suddenly decided to become his lap dog. Putin who's made no bones about disregrding the newly found voice of the people in favor of his own agenda?

Whatever makes you think it's less democratic now?

#11 Aug 07 2007 at 1:11 PM Rating: Excellent
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Don't get sassy with me, Missy. Shadomen, intentionally or not, made it sound as if the lack of people thrown into gulags today meant that things were "better". Certainly it's better today than in, say, 1982 but that doesn't mean things are improving.

In short: Smiley: tongue
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#12 Aug 07 2007 at 1:15 PM Rating: Good
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Since when do we take shadomen's posts seriously?

GDI I'm not getting the memos again.
#13 Aug 07 2007 at 2:08 PM Rating: Decent
Celcio wrote:
Since when do we take shadomen's posts seriously?

GDI I'm not getting the memos again.


I have been known to say something that almost makes sense every once in a while. Usually its after I whack my head though...
#14 Aug 07 2007 at 4:18 PM Rating: Good
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You are all still suckling off the Cold War propaganda. Russia is like just like America; only much bigger and operates in a way that the American government can only have wet dreams about.
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#15 Aug 08 2007 at 3:22 AM Rating: Good
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I base my opinion of Russia solely on my Russian Interpreter, who, when asked if she would return to live there, says "absolutely not" and goes off on a tirade about living under communism.
#16 Aug 08 2007 at 6:23 AM Rating: Good
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Atomicflea wrote:
I base my opinion of Russia solely on my Russian Interpreter, who, when asked if she would return to live there, says "absolutely not" and goes off on a tirade about living under communism.


I thought Ayn Rand was dead...
#17 Aug 08 2007 at 9:30 AM Rating: Good
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In Soviet Russia, old never gets joke.
#18 Aug 08 2007 at 9:58 AM Rating: Decent
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I had heard about the camp. Yessiree on NPR. They did whole multi-segment report last month.

Thing is, if Russia starts getting gnarly right now, people are really gonna be freaked out as our military is all engaged elsewhere.

In another related story, the Russians were the first to reach the ocean floor beneath the arctic recently. They even planted a flag down there..Smiley: clown






Edited, Aug 8th 2007 8:00pm by Elinda
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#19 Aug 08 2007 at 4:28 PM Rating: Good
Celcio wrote:
Atomicflea wrote:
I base my opinion of Russia solely on my Russian Interpreter, who, when asked if she would return to live there, says "absolutely not" and goes off on a tirade about living under communism.


I thought Ayn Rand was dead...


You haven't met many people who lived under communism. It was really bad. They remember it.

#20 Aug 10 2007 at 11:41 AM Rating: Good
Quote:

You haven't met many people who lived under communism. It was really bad. They remember it.


Reminds me of a joke I heard,

Russia, 1971, A man walks into a store and asks, "is there any meat here?" The owner looks shocked and says, in a snobby, matter-of-fact tone, "dear sir, there is no meat, on the other side of the street, here, there are no shoes!"

Also, another one, probably will be easier to understand in english than the last one, as I originally heard them in Polish.

Poland, 1939, a man, let's call him Ralph, goes mushroom picking in a forest the day before the Germans invade. Having a Terrible sense of direction, he gets lost. He stays in the forest, living off mushrooms, for twenty years, until he finally walks out onto a highway, and sees a man standing at a tram stop, waiting for the tram. He walks up to the man and asks, "Excuse me sir, but, what day is it?" "Why, Tuesday, March 14th, 1979." The man responds. "wow, so I've been in the forest for twenty years!" "Twenty years? What did you eat?" asks the man. "Mushrooms." "wow, twenty years," the man looks incredulous, "so you must know nothing about the war." What war?" Ralph asks. The man introduces himself as a government official and proceeds to tell Ralph about the war, and about all the wonders and benefits of the new communist (really Socialist) system of government. When he finishes, he asks Ralph, "So, you coming with me?" Ralph looks at the man and says, "actually, no, I'm just going to go continue my mushroom picking
#21 Aug 10 2007 at 11:46 AM Rating: Decent
veneret wrote:


Poland, 1939, a man, let's call him Ralph, goes mushroom picking in a forest the day before the Germans invade. Having a Terrible sense of direction, he gets lost. He stays in the forest, living off mushrooms, for twenty years, until he finally walks out onto a highway, and sees a man standing at a tram stop, waiting for the tram. He walks up to the man and asks, "Excuse me sir, but, what day is it?" "Why, Tuesday, March 14th, 1979." The man responds. "wow, so I've been in the forest for twenty years!" "Twenty years? What did you eat?" asks the man. "Mushrooms." "wow, twenty years," the man looks incredulous, "so you must know nothing about the war." What war?" Ralph asks. The man introduces himself as a government official and proceeds to tell Ralph about the war, and about all the wonders and benefits of the new communist (really Socialist) system of government. When he finishes, he asks Ralph, "So, you coming with me?" Ralph looks at the man and says, "actually, no, I'm just going to go continue my mushroom picking


My math may be fuzzy but 1939 + 20 = 1979?
#22 Aug 10 2007 at 11:52 AM Rating: Decent
Quote:
My math may be fuzzy but 1939 + 20 = 1979?


Fun fact: Poland is a beer country.

Fun fact: I realize my mistake, but am too lazy to change it, so yes, it does.
#23 Aug 10 2007 at 1:06 PM Rating: Good
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I base my opinion of Russia solely on my Russian Interpreter, who, when asked if she would return to live there, says "absolutely not" and goes off on a tirade about living under communism.


I base my opinion of the US solely on an expat bartender in Bangkok who, when asked if he would return to live here said "no way" and then went off on a tirade about the high prices of Tranny whores in LA.

____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

#24 Aug 10 2007 at 1:23 PM Rating: Good
I base my opinion of the check republic solely on the drunken hobo behind my apartment building who, when asked if he would return to live there, says "Nyagrglrglaflawhaaa?" and then goes of on a tirade about how the cows are secretly marketing mind-control Tonic as Red bull, and how a joint task force made of ***** and Jews is our only hope for survival.

I like that hobo.
#25 Aug 10 2007 at 3:34 PM Rating: Good
veneret wrote:
Quote:

You haven't met many people who lived under communism. It was really bad. They remember it.


Reminds me of a joke I heard,

Russia, 1971, A man walks into a store and asks, "is there any meat here?" The owner looks shocked and says, in a snobby, matter-of-fact tone, "dear sir, there is no meat, on the other side of the street, here, there are no shoes!"

Also, another one, probably will be easier to understand in english than the last one, as I originally heard them in Polish.

Poland, 1939, a man, let's call him Ralph, goes mushroom picking in a forest the day before the Germans invade. Having a Terrible sense of direction, he gets lost. He stays in the forest, living off mushrooms, for twenty years, until he finally walks out onto a highway, and sees a man standing at a tram stop, waiting for the tram. He walks up to the man and asks, "Excuse me sir, but, what day is it?" "Why, Tuesday, March 14th, 1979." The man responds. "wow, so I've been in the forest for twenty years!" "Twenty years? What did you eat?" asks the man. "Mushrooms." "wow, twenty years," the man looks incredulous, "so you must know nothing about the war." What war?" Ralph asks. The man introduces himself as a government official and proceeds to tell Ralph about the war, and about all the wonders and benefits of the new communist (really Socialist) system of government. When he finishes, he asks Ralph, "So, you coming with me?" Ralph looks at the man and says, "actually, no, I'm just going to go continue my mushroom picking


It's amazing all the former Eastern Bloc nations aren't all Estonia-like in their economic systems, so as to (in some sense) go as far away from Communism as possible.
#26 Aug 10 2007 at 3:38 PM Rating: Good
Jophiel wrote:
A regular grab-bag of Russian fun to enjoy. You don't hear too much about the day-to-day in Russia these days although, under Putin, it's been sliding further and further into its Cold War costume. With all of our attention on the Middle East and Russia largely forgotten from the national conscious, imagine the surprise if and when the next US/Russian proxy war pops up someday.



But we have nothing to worry about. George W. Bush gazed deeply into Putin's soul and knows he is one of the good guys. And since everyone is either with us or against us (according to the fearless leader), everything Putin does must be just fine.

He's doing a "heck of a job".

I'd continue but at this point it's just too sad.
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