Well, from the teachings of my Anger Management class: so? Everything in life is a choice, she chooses to act the way she does, and you choose to put up with it. Your hubby sounds like an ok guy and is WAY ahead of the game on this one, kudos to him. Or he is a prick.
I feel for ya though, my gf's ex had the same dominating personality your mom does, except not the "woe is me" approach, more the "do what I fuc
kin say and I won't be sayin it twice" kind of apporach. Do what my gf did, and remove yourself from the situation. No matter how difficult it may be, you will thank yourself later and will help build a stronger relationship with your hubby.