**** me!Follow

One of my best friends just started dating a girl, and he says that everything is going great. However, the one thing that irks him is that, during sex, she likes to say "fuck me! fuck me!" He says he has to try not to laugh because, after all, what the hell do you think he's doing?!

So, how many of you ladies are guilty of this? What's the stupidest thing you've ever heard/said during sex?

I love you.

'Thank you'

I'm British, dammit

I don't know about stupid, but one of the oddest things that happened to me during sex was when I got a bloody nose. And yes, I was on top. I started to roll off her and she asked what the hell I was doing, and I told her I had a bloody nose.

She said, "Well don't you dare fUcking stop." So I kept going, and bled all over her forehead and hair. When we were done she laughed about it, and went in the bathroom to wash it all off/out. It was kinda creepy.

Edited, Jul 22nd 2007 1:50pm by Kakar

Yeah, I've had that happen too, annoyed the hell out of me.

Ahem, I have a suggestion. I understand what she is saying. She would like for him to become a little rougher with her when she is saying that. She feels the need to be dominated. TRUST ME on this. If he makes the sex a little rougher when she says this, he will find that the experience is indescribable.

Translation: Wrap it up already, I've got stuff to do!

Amen!

As it turns out, most women don't like being called dirty whores during sex.

True story.

I had a girl like that a couple of years ago. In the end I just had to tell her I wasn't that into her. It was an odd scenario, wherein I couldn't ejaculate to save my life, although I was giving her multiples, which is usually plenty to breach my threshhold.

It may have been because she was so insecure about her breasts that she wouldn't let me see them, let alone manipulate them. I mean, if she was holding back that morsel, how could she expect me to seal the deal?

Or maybe it was because she was married with children and the guilt I felt subconciously wouldn't allow me to fully consumate.

Nah, that can't have been it.

Call me an idealist, an optimist, an orgasmist even, but surely there are times when you're engrossed in the act itself, ladies? I mean, there are sessions when I barely move, content to just linger inside and perform the most erotic of all interactions: the kiss.

Tell me you're not all so jaded and desensitized as to really devalue the intense connection that is best realized through a physical bond? Or are we really just animals, performing the ritual merely to get our collective rocks off, wanting nothing more than the proper amount of friction?

Tell me I'm not the only one who sometimes invests an emotional, investment, in the act. My God, I am such a girl when I'm drunk.

And now within me rages the debate that has tormented each and every one of Katie's lovers since time immeroable: Is it a good thing to have her in agreement with your intercourse practices?

Immeroable is not a word, but it means since time began.