Patrick and Seamus find a mirror in the street.
Seamus looks into the mirror and says:
Jayzus - Dat face is familiar but sure I can't put a name to it. Who da feck is it?
Patrick snatches the mirror from him and takes a look. He turns to Seamus and says
Ya daft feckin' eejit! It's Me!
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"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
I've heard that joke before, but it was two blondes.
I still don't get it.
Nexa
I still don't get it.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Nexa wrote:
I've heard that joke before, but it was two blondes.
I still don't get it.
I still don't get it.
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Nobby wrote:
Dye your hair brown and I'll run it past you again.
Oh I couldn't do that...people would start expecting something of me and I much prefer to be impressive.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
It's still the same joke but now you know the blondes' names
fhrugby the Sly wrote:
It's still the same joke but now you know the blondes' names
Yes, but to be blonde AND Irish....poor lads.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Nexa wrote:
I don't quite know how to say how I feel.
Those three words are said too much.
They're not enough.
If I lay here, if I just lay here,
would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told, before we get too old. Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
Let's waste time chasing cars around our heads.
I need your grace to remind me to find my own...
Those three words are said too much.
They're not enough.
If I lay here, if I just lay here,
would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told, before we get too old. Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
Let's waste time chasing cars around our heads.
I need your grace to remind me to find my own...
She stole our song from last year!
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Nobby wrote:
Darqflame!
She stole our song from last year!
She stole our song from last year!
Aww, that's so sweet.
I've never had "a song" with a boy...not even in like, junior high.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Nexa wrote:
Aww, that's so sweet.
I've never had "a song" with a boy...not even in like, junior high.
I've never had "a song" with a boy...not even in like, junior high.
Last Spring 'Chasing Cars' was one of the songs I sent her that we could both listen to while apart.
That and "You're all I have" - awesome album
Trust me - she's worth it
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Nobby wrote:
Long distance relationships and all that.
hahaha, yeah.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.
Bush asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."
Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"
Bush nods: "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."
"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"
Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"
Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.
"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."
Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"
And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb sh*t, it's Tony Blair!"
Bush asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."
Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"
Bush nods: "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."
"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"
Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"
Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.
"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."
Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"
And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb sh*t, it's Tony Blair!"
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