Hehe, not as funny as this one :
http://www.funreports.com/fun/10-11-2004/1134-0
Quote:
Two women attempted to experience sexual pleasure from an intimate contact with a cat. The weird endeavor ended rather sad for one of the women: she was hospitalized with severe genital injuries.
Doctors arrived to hospitalize a woman, who had suffered from unexpected bleeding, as they were told on the phone. They saw a woman lying on the sofa. The woman was wearing only a jumper. Streaks of blood could be seen on her legs. The woman's friend was speechless to explain what happened. The woman was taken to the gynecological department of the local hospital, where doctors determined the unusual character of the genital injuries. Stitching the wounds, they supposed that a sex maniac had attacked the woman and injured her in the crotch. The truth, however, surpassed all expectations. When the woman recovered, she confessed that she had been injured during her love act with a cat. The woman's name was Svetlana. Her husband, an entrepreneur, was constantly away on business trips. That day he was out of town too. Svetlana was bored and she decided to visit her friend, Vera. The two women had some wine and started talking about intimate matters. Vera was the first, who suggested trying something totally unusual: "Do you wanna try the real thing?" asked she. When Vera clarified, what the real thing was about, Svetlana was terrified. However, the idea seemed to be attractive to her after the women talked about it and had some more wine. "Life is too short, one has to try everything!" Svetlana decided. Vera brought in a cat. The cat named as Timka was living in the house for quite a long time. Vera took her clothes off, put the light out and played an adult movie on the video recorder. She lied down, took a bottle of valerian and poured some on her most intimate body part. When the cat smelled valerian, he started licking it away, putting Vera in the state of ecstasy. "Now it is your turn, you try," Vera told Svetlana when she was done. "You know, my friend, there is nothing better than the cat's little tongue," said she. When the cat started licking valerian off from Svetlana, something happened to the animal. Timka probably took too much of the medication: he started licking the liquid away but all of a sudden he seized the genitals of the poor woman with his claws and teeth. Svetlana screamed and tried to push the fierce pet lover away from her, but the cat wouldn't let go. Vera hurried to help her friend: she emptied a bucket of water on the cat and threw the animal out of the house. When she saw that Svetlana was bleeding, she called an ambulance. When Svetlana returned home from the hospital, she had to tell the story to her husband, Boris. The man could not take the fact that his wife preferred having oral sex with a cat: Boris kicked Svetlana out of the house and the abandoned woman had to stay with her mother. The offended man is not going to forgive his wife: the couple is currently divorcing. It is noteworthy that lonely women often use their pets (cats or dogs, regardless of sex) to satisfy their sexual needs. Such pet adventures often lead to lamentable consequences - not for pets, but for ******-craving women, as a rule. An overdose of valerian can make the loveliest cat become a fierce and aggressive animal.
s are teh seksay!