http://www.reuters.com/article/worldNews/idUSISL26622820070310
SPIN BOLDAK, Afghanistan (Reuters) - Osama bin Laden, if he's alive, celebrates his 50th birthday on Saturday, and his friends in the Taliban prayed for his long life.
Happy Birthday, big O! I'd get you a gift, but it seems you've gotten everything you wanted in the last six years, so I'll just go with traditional best wishes.
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What do you get the man who has everyhting?Follow
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To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
10,000 virgins?
Speeling!
Edited, Mar 13th 2007 5:50am by Tare
Speeling!
Edited, Mar 13th 2007 5:50am by Tare
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
A vial of weaponized anthrax?
I just spent twenty minutes searching the web for what I consider the ultimate terrorist-on-the-go gift, and apparently they don't make them.
There is an untapped market for anyone with the know-how to replicate a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******. Currently I'm only as far as the research phase, but developement could begin by April.
There is an untapped market for anyone with the know-how to replicate a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******. Currently I'm only as far as the research phase, but developement could begin by April.
Barkingturtle wrote:
I just spent twenty minutes searching the web for what I consider the ultimate terrorist-on-the-go gift, and apparently they don't make them.
There is an untapped market for anyone with the know-how to replicate a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******. Currently I'm only as far as the research phase, but developement could begin by April.
There is an untapped market for anyone with the know-how to replicate a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******. Currently I'm only as far as the research phase, but developement could begin by April.
That should be easy enough to adapt from Aegis' PocketGoat.
publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
What do you get the man who has everyhting?
Penicillin?
Penicillin?
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Nobby wrote:
What do you get the man who has everything?
Penicillin?
Penicillin?
A gift certificate for a free dialysis?
A nice tombstone.
How long has it been since his last message? 1 year? 2?
I think he's dead, pushing up the virgins in some Afghan poppy field.
Edited, Mar 12th 2007 12:32pm by RedPhoenixxx
How long has it been since his last message? 1 year? 2?
I think he's dead, pushing up the virgins in some Afghan poppy field.
Edited, Mar 12th 2007 12:32pm by RedPhoenixxx
Monsieur RedPhoenixxx wrote:
A nice tombstone.
How long has it been since his last message? 1 year? 2?
I think he's dead, pushing up the virgins in some Afghan poppy field.
How long has it been since his last message? 1 year? 2?
I think he's dead, pushing up the virgins in some Afghan poppy field.
I don't think he's dead, but I think that his medical condition makes it increasingly difficult for him to be moved all over the place...therefore he wouldn't want to be releasing tapes that might be tracked to his location, requiring a move.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Beard trimmer.
A bar of Lava.
Kaelesh is a goat ******.
Magnavoxroan wrote:
Kaelesh is a goat @#%^er.
Old news, move on.
Donate. One day it could be your family.
An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. Victor Hugo
An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. Victor Hugo
Sunshine and farts.
"I have lost my way
But I hear a tale
About a heaven in Alberta
Where they've got all hell for a basement"
But I hear a tale
About a heaven in Alberta
Where they've got all hell for a basement"
noopzilla wrote:
ugh... such typical responses..
Barkingturtle wrote:
a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******
Umm, yeah.
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
noopzilla wrote:
Tare wrote:
noopzilla wrote:
ugh... such typical responses..
Barkingturtle wrote:
a pocket-sized version of a sheep's ******
Umm, yeah.
dude, EVERYONE has a pocket-size sheep ******. i mean COME ON, get with the 00s. or something. wait, how do you say that? the 2000s? the zeros? crap i just blew my own mind bbl
Fine then, fill it with pocket-sized spider monkey assassins, you fUcking fUck.
Nexa wrote:
I don't think he's dead, but I think that his medical condition makes it increasingly difficult for him to be moved all over the place...therefore he wouldn't want to be releasing tapes that might be tracked to his location, requiring a move.
Nexa
Nexa
Possibly.
But in either case, he's either dead, or as good as.
So I guess he might need some condoms for the 10,000 virgins waiting for him. Or do people not get pregnant in heaven?
Monsieur RedPhoenixxx wrote:
Possibly.
But in either case, he's either dead, or as good as.
So I guess he might need some condoms for the 10,000 virgins waiting for him. Or do people not get pregnant in heaven?
Well they have to make a new batch of virgins every now and then. Duh.
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Nexa wrote:
Well they have to make a new batch of virgins every now and then. Duh.
Nexa
Nexa
It must get awfully crowded in there.
Good things they have heavenly suicide-bombers to make a bit of space.
Monsieur RedPhoenixxx wrote:
So I guess he might need some condoms for the 10,000 virgins waiting for him. Or do people not get pregnant in heaven?
Immaculate conception only?
Considering the rapid rate at which banging virgins gets old, I think for his birthday Osama would probably dig a night with Katie.
If we had someone else around here who was a confirmed *****, it wouldn't always have to be Katie.
If we had someone else around here who was a confirmed *****, it wouldn't always have to be Katie.
Barkingturtle wrote:
If we had someone else around here who was a confirmed *****, it wouldn't always have to be Katie.
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