Hole in my headFollow

I'll have some of that please.

Nope.

No clue.

I think I'm gonna have a pizza smoothie for dinner.

You mean a Pikko Colada?

At least you can sell it on the black market for some extra cash.. :)

I broke my jaw a few years ago, back in the day when they used to immobilise it by wiring your top and bottom sets of teeth together.

When your top teeth are tightly wired to your bottom teeth, its impossible to do two things (3 if you count trying to stuff the bits and peices of an ecstacy pill between them)

1. Curse people in a way that doesn't make them laugh at you.

And 2. eat anything with lumps in.

For 3 farking weeks!

And because I was doing some temping work at an East London hospital, I was living in the nurses accomadation (wich sux. Cos all night you would be kept awake by hairy drunken irish nurses singing about Molly Malone with that stupid diddly diddly tune they use for all their drunken music, and vomiting in the corridor outside your room).

Any way my cooking facilities were very limited. so for those three weeks all I ate was instant mash potato with instant gravy powder mixed in. Sometimes I would splurge on a Maccy D's milkshake, when no one was looking, and I can say with some authority that the ONLY tinned soup with NO lumps whatsoever, is Heinz Cream of Tomato. ALL others have lumps or bits of stuff that get stuck in your teeth.

After 3 weeks, I begged one of the surgeons to take the wires out during a break between ops. He did too. In the lunch room, with a pair of pliers and his knee on my chest. B'stard. Brushing the insides of my teeth and my toungue was a pleasure I'll never forget.

That night, I bought a HUGE Chinese Take-away, took it home. piled it all on a plate, and.....managed 3 (plastic) sporkfulls before my shrunken stomach was stuffed. Couldn't fit another prawn cracker in.

In conclusion, havin a coupla wisdom teeth out is a doddle.

Sack up you *****.