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National Stereotypes:Follow

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#1 Mar 08 2007 at 2:43 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
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Things Englishmen always hear when visiting the USA:

  • Oh I have an Aunt in London - you probably know her!
  • Have you met the Queen?
  • I love the Beatles!
  • I love your accent!
  • Leave my wife alone or I'll shoot your Limey ***!


Things Americans always hear when visiting the UK:

  • Oh I have an Aunt in New York - you probably know her!
  • Have you met Clint Eastwood?
  • I love Elvis Presley!
  • I love your accent!
  • Want to buy this Cassette Player? It belonged to William Shakespeare!


Do, please, add to the list
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#2 Mar 08 2007 at 2:49 PM Rating: Decent
Smasharoo
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Things Americans always hear when visiting the UK:

  • Really? You don't sound Canadian, but here's that big flag sewn on your backpack..


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To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

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#3 Mar 08 2007 at 2:51 PM Rating: Excellent
Samira
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I have yet to meet a Brit that could resist trying to imitate my accent. It's cute the first 900 times.
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#4 Mar 08 2007 at 2:51 PM Rating: Decent
__DEL__1622420402685
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Nobby wrote:
I love your accent!


LOL. Earlier today I was speaking to an english lass. I almost told her this.
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#5 Mar 08 2007 at 2:52 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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Quote:
I thought all Brits had bad teeth
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#6 Mar 08 2007 at 2:53 PM Rating: Good
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MentalFrog wrote:
Nobby wrote:
I love your accent!


LOL. Earlier today I was speaking to an english lass. I almost grabbed ahold of her tits.



FTFY
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#7 Mar 08 2007 at 2:53 PM Rating: Good
Nadenu
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"I bet the names Scarlet and Rhett are pretty common around here, aren't they?"
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#8 Mar 08 2007 at 2:53 PM Rating: Excellent
Nexa
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Things Englishmen always hear when Americans visit the UK:
-hahaha, spotted dick
-hahaha, *******
-hahaha, ****
-why are there so many rotaries?

Things Americans always hear when Englishmen visit America:
-that's a lot of food
-that's a really long drive


Please, do add to the list!

Nexa

Edited, Mar 8th 2007 5:55pm by Nexa
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#9 Mar 08 2007 at 2:54 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
Ministry of Silly Cnuts
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Samira wrote:
I have yet to meet a Brit that could make any fUcking sense of my slackjaw accent.
Aww.

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#10 Mar 08 2007 at 2:54 PM Rating: Decent
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The Glorious GitSlayer wrote:
MentalFrog wrote:
Nobby wrote:
I love your accent!


LOL. Earlier today I was speaking to an english lass. I almost grabbed ahold of her tits.



FTFY


It was on the phone and she was hundreds of miles away. If I had at&t I could reach out and touch her, but I don't so I didn't.
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#11 Mar 08 2007 at 2:54 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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Oooohh
Quote:
I can't believe you suck ****.
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#12 Mar 08 2007 at 2:55 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
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Nadenu wrote:
"I bet the names Scarlet and Rhett are pretty common around here, aren't they?"
BAM
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#13 Mar 08 2007 at 2:56 PM Rating: Excellent
Samira
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"What the hell do you mean, 'Have I got a rubber?'"
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#14 Mar 08 2007 at 2:58 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
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Mistress Darqflame wrote:
Oooohh
Quote:
I can't believe you suck ****.


Phrases to avoid when visiting Hick Towns the USA:

"Going for a ***" - (Frowned upon)
"Stepping outside to smoke a ***" - (Cheers and celebratory gunshots ensue)
"Your wife looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp" - (run)
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"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
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#15 Mar 08 2007 at 2:59 PM Rating: Good
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Things people say when they find out I live in Southern California:

  • Do you know any Movie Stars!
  • I wanna learn to surf someday!
  • I bet you go to Disneyland all the time!
  • Don't all the earthquakes bother you?
  • Dude!





'cus I'm board and it's funny ...to me.
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#16 Mar 08 2007 at 3:00 PM Rating: Good
Nadenu
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Things Brits shouldn't tell American girls:

"I'll be around later and knock you up."
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#17 Mar 08 2007 at 3:03 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
Ministry of Silly Cnuts
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19,524 posts
Nadenu wrote:
Things Brits shouldn't tell American girls:

"I'll be around later and knock you up."
I genuinely failed to explain the occupation of the "Knocker Up" who was employed to walk the streets around cotton mills with a 6 foot pole at 5am to "Knock Up" the mill workers.

It was a Cherokee Biker bar. Go Figure
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"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
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#18 Mar 08 2007 at 3:04 PM Rating: Decent
Smasharoo
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Things Americans always hear when visiting the UK:

  • My goodness, you're right, it really is much bigger.

____________________________
Disclaimer:

To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.

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#19 Mar 08 2007 at 3:08 PM Rating: Decent
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Quote:
My goodness, you're right, it really is much bigger, how do you manage that ego?
FTFY.
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#20 Mar 08 2007 at 3:09 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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tarv of the Seven Seas wrote:
Quote:
My goodness, you're right, it really is much bigger, how do you manage that ego?
FTFY.


No doubt!
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