Well kinda, I took a nasty fall this past weekend and broke a metacarpal in my hand. I get a cast on tomorrow and am learning to deal with just using my right hand (im right handed thank bob). I have off til thursday but I haven't yet spoke with the orthopedic surgeon, he may give me more time off.
Things I have learned suck to do with a busted hand:
tieing my shoes
Wiping my ***
playing videogames
typing fast
typing with the SHIFT bar
sleeping
sex
cooking
getting up
there are other odd and end annoyances but they just take some getting used to. The above are damn near impossible.
Hopefully within a week or two the pain will subside and my left fingers will become more useful. Anyone have any wicked broken bone stories?
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So I lost my left handFollow
Don't forget showering. 
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
Tare wrote:
Don't forget showering.
That, believe it or not, was not as bad as I thought. I tend to be a clean freak with my body so I taught myself quick.
****
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Well at least you can jack off.
I've learned how to manage a lot of things left-handed. The only things I'd have real trouble with are writing and gaming.
I've learned how to manage a lot of things left-handed. The only things I'd have real trouble with are writing and gaming.
publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
King Nobby wrote:
****
nope still got my right hand for that.
Quote:
sex
getting up
getting up
isn't that the same thing...?
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You require both hands to wipe your ***?
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking.Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking.It can be a little awkward if you're not used to it. Wiping with your offhand that is.
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 4:56pm PDT by Debalic
publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
Butt it's not his offhand!
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 5:01pm PDT by Pikko
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 5:01pm PDT by Pikko
Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking.
I couldn't imagine not using two hands. Maybe I am just overly clean but two hands allows for a cleaner bum. I don't wanna get in to specifics... really you only use one?
stupid SHIFT button
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 5:56pm PDT by Soracloud
Soracloud the Charming wrote:
Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking. I couldn't imagine not using two hands. Maybe I am just overly clean but two hands allows for a cleaner bum. I don't wanna get in to specifics... really you only use one?
stupid SHIFT button
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 5:56pm PDT by Soracloud
I only use one. I can't figure what you'd use the other for, unless you're double fistin' the TP.
You didn't mention buttoning your pants, I would think that would be pretty tricky as well.
Some people are like slinkies, they aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
Soracloud the Charming wrote:
Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking. I couldn't imagine not using two hands. Maybe I am just overly clean but two hands allows for a cleaner bum. I don't wanna get in to specifics... really you only use one?
stupid SHIFT button
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 5:56pm PDT by Soracloud
Doesn't everyone? You seem to be the only freak around here.
Soracloud the Charming wrote:
Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking. I couldn't imagine not using two hands. Maybe I am just overly clean but two hands allows for a cleaner bum. I don't wanna get in to specifics... really you only use one?
Dude, how far inside are you wiping? I'm afraid you're going to need to go into specifics, or I'm going to assume you're wiping your tonsils, up to your shoulder in your own ***.
Grandfather Barkingturtle wrote:
Soracloud the Charming wrote:
Thumbelyna Quick Hands wrote:
Pikko Pots wrote:
You require both hands to wipe your ***?
That's what I was thinking. I couldn't imagine not using two hands. Maybe I am just overly clean but two hands allows for a cleaner bum. I don't wanna get in to specifics... really you only use one?
Dude, how far inside are you wiping? I'm afraid you're going to need to go into specifics, or I'm going to assume you're wiping your tonsils, up to your shoulder in your own ***.
The guy in the next cubicle is probably wondering wtf I'm laughing so hard at.
If one would go into specifics, I would assume he uses his other hand to spread his **** that much more open, which leads me to my next question...
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
Sir Exodus, Eater of Cheese wrote:
If one would go into specifics, I would assume he uses his other hand to spread his **** that much more open, which leads me to my next question...
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
OMG
DF wrote:
Sir Exodus, Eater of Cheese wrote:
If one would go into specifics, I would assume he uses his other hand to spread his **** that much more open, which leads me to my next question...
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
OMG
If one would go into specifics, I would assume he uses his other hand to spread his **** that much more open, which leads me to my next question...
Exactly how much you weigh to have to pull layers of *** out of the way for a better reach?
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 6:09pm PDT by Exodus
OMG
I'm just laughing so hard right now.
Anyone else getting the feeling that the way Sora injured his paw wasn't really by means of a nasty tumble but rather was the result of over-eager wiping? This sort of accident is exactly why I now employ a midget who licks me clean.
Laughing? I'm crying.
maybe he needs them both to search for lemmiwinks...
/too obscure?
/too obscure?
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/remembers Sora's old avatar
Maybe no details are neccessary.
Maybe no details are neccessary.
Grandfather Barkingturtle wrote:
Anyone else getting the feeling that the way Sora injured his paw wasn't really by means of a nasty tumble but rather was the result of over-eager wiping? This sort of accident is exactly why I now employ a midget who licks me clean.
Meh. Midgets are Union and cost too much, use the neighborhood kids, they're cheap labour.
Some people are like slinkies, they aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
Grandfather Barkingturtle wrote:
Dude, how far inside are you wiping? I'm afraid you're going to need to go into specifics, or I'm going to assume you're wiping your tonsils, up to your shoulder in your own ***.
Nah, with him, two knuckles should be enough.
I guess I would say I use two, but the off-hand is mainly there to hold the yambag up out of the way.
***-cheeks aside, I can't believe that no ones picked up on the reported effect on sex. If you can't enjoy sex lacking one hand, you're not doing it correctly. Some of my favorite positions involve the restraint of one or more hands...
Edit: I broke my wrist when I was 11, and it didn't affect my sex life one bit. A few years ago however, I separated my shoulder. That just fucked up any hope of enjoying sex since I couldn't even move without significant pain.
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 8:16pm PDT by Gladestrider
Edit: I broke my wrist when I was 11, and it didn't affect my sex life one bit. A few years ago however, I separated my shoulder. That just fucked up any hope of enjoying sex since I couldn't even move without significant pain.
Edited, Oct 17th 2006 at 8:16pm PDT by Gladestrider
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