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#1 Aug 31 2006 at 4:39 PM Rating: Good
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[link=hhttp://news.mainetoday.com/updates/006922.html]what the hell?[/link]

Quote:
Life-sized likenesses of Guard members ease separation pains

Posted by The Associated Press, Wire Report



BANGOR — Lt. Col. Randall Holbrook travels just about everywhere with his wife Mary and their two sons, Justin, 14, and Logan, 5.

He’s quietly in the background on family outings to the grocery store, to restaurants, camping, even on Mary’s most recent visit to her gynecologist.

Randall has little to say because he’s a ‘‘Flat Daddy,’’ a two-dimensional foam board likeness from the waist up of the Maine Army National Guard officer from Hermon who was sent to Afghanistan in January with the 240th Engineer Group of Augusta.

The Guard has provided more than 100 of the cutouts to families of deployed service members as a way to ease the pain of separation.
‘‘It’s comforting,’’ Mary Holbrook told the Bangor Daily News. ‘‘It did help me adjust a lot.’’

The Flat Daddy - and Flat Mommy - program got started at the beginning of the year with the deployment of the Brewer-based B Company, 3rd Battalion of the 172nd Mountain Infantry.

The Guard pays to have a photo of the troop member blown up and provides supplies to families to attach the photo to foam board. Cutouts also are provided to parents and family members of childless service members.

The Holbrooks’ Flat Daddy has been to birthday parties, ballgames, school, the hairdresser, the babysitter’s with Logan, and to the funeral of Mary Holbrook’s mother.

Justin dressed him in a Red Sox jersey and hat while watching a baseball game. On Halloween, he had a sumo wrestler outfit.

Taking Flat Daddy out in public can draw some funny looks, Mary Holbrook said, but many tell her they think it’s a great idea.

‘‘Any time I get invited somewhere, I take it with me,’’ she said. And the gynecologist? ‘‘He just thought it was really neat,’’ she said.

When the family first got him, they propped him up in a chair at dinner.

‘‘We put plates in front of him the first few days,’’ Holbrook said. ‘‘But he didn’t eat much.’’


Even though the idea may seem a little silly at first, the foam board cutout can help alleviate the pain of a loved one’s absence, she said.

‘‘It makes you feel like he’s right there,’’ she said, as the Flat Daddy of her husband rested in a nearby lawn chair.

At first, Sherri Fish of Bangor thought the head-to-toe Flat Daddy likeness of her husband was a little foolish. But she put it up on the door in her son Kevin’s room when Air National Guard Staff Sgt. Richard Fish deployed to Iraq in March 2005.

Kevin, then 3, was angry that his father was gone and wouldn’t speak to him when he called home from Tikrit, Sherri Fish said.

‘‘It was really hard on him,’’ she said. ‘‘It was probably the hardest thing I had to go through while Rich was gone.’’

Then Sherri began hearing Kevin talking while alone in his room.

‘‘One night, I finally asked him, ’Who are you talking to?’ And he said, ’I’m talking to Daddy,’’ Fish said. ‘‘I just about broke down crying.’’

Despite his anger at his father, Kevin was able to relate to the life-sized likeness, Sherri Fish said. ‘‘He’d sit at the end of his bed and tell him what went on at school that day,’’ she said.

Even after Richard Fish returned home last October, Kevin continued talking to Flat Daddy while his father was at work, she said.

It’s funny how a piece of foam board can ease a child’s pain so much, she said, ‘‘even though it’s just a picture.’’





Seriously, the guard is paying for this and thought it was a good idea? I can not imagine the majority of people who's loved ones were deported could actually think this was an alleviation.


this quote:
‘‘It makes you feel like he’s right there,’’ she said, as the Flat Daddy of her husband rested in a nearby lawn chair.



makes me immdeiatly think he obviously didnt do much in the relationship if you can actually compare a cardboard cutout and the real deal this way.


Any of you folks involved in the military hear about something like this? Or whats the thoughts on the majority of you civilians? Do you think its quite sane and perfectly ordinary to bring a cardboard cutout of your husband to the gynos?
#2 Aug 31 2006 at 4:45 PM Rating: Good
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#3 Aug 31 2006 at 4:45 PM Rating: Good
We, that being my family, have a cardboard cut out of my cousin's head. He's in Iraq right now with the Army, but we take him to different local events. Things like the Pikes Peak Hill Climb, amusement parks, the fair, weddings, birthdays etc. We photograph him in these places. Sometimes he's behind the wheel of a race car; sometimes he's on a roller coaster. The rationale is that when he gets home he'll have pics of himself doing all the things he missed out on, and he gets the pics e-mailed to him as well.

It's for his benefit, though, moreso than ours.

It's just another way we let him know he's in our thoughts, beside sending him ice-packs and stuff.

Edited, Aug 31st 2006 at 5:51pm EDT by Barkingturtle
#4 Aug 31 2006 at 4:46 PM Rating: Good
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You've got to wonder what the people around her were thinking when she'd come walking into the hair-dressers or whatever with a cardboard cutout of her husband. I'd have to think she would start to be treated like a crazy person.
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#5 Aug 31 2006 at 4:48 PM Rating: Decent
Quote:
Even after Richard Fish returned home last October, Kevin continued talking to Flat Daddy while his father was at work, she said.


Good thing that brilliant plan didn't mess up the kid.

WTF is wrong with a picture in the wallet/purse?
#6 Aug 31 2006 at 4:49 PM Rating: Good
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I guess it's whatever helps them cope. Myself, I wouldn't do that. I would just feel silly and my husband would think I'm off my rocker to do that. I have a body-length pillow that I snuggle up against at night and one of his T-shirts I wear and that's about it. Each of my kids have stuffed animals their dad gave them that they cuddle with when they feel the need.

I know the separation is a bit of a shock for the reserved military members and national guard that have been called to active duty, but the ones already on active duty are probably more used to the separations since it's pretty regular.
#7 Aug 31 2006 at 4:50 PM Rating: Good
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I could maybe see it for the benefit of little ones who are too young to understand why daddy has to go away for so long. Even then though, I tend to think that explaining the situation over and over again is more beneficial than to make a fantasy of having your loved one there.


BUT.....


What the hell does the wife get out of this? Taking it to a Gyno visit? Hairstylist appointment? I swear to Bob if I hear women are strapping ****** to the flat daddy to pretend they're still around, I say get the straight jackets fast.

Edited, Aug 31st 2006 at 5:51pm EDT by DSD
#8 Aug 31 2006 at 4:51 PM Rating: Good
The real question is this: Can you call it cheating if it's done through a glory hole?
#9 Aug 31 2006 at 4:54 PM Rating: Good
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LOL
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#10 Aug 31 2006 at 5:19 PM Rating: Decent
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BT wrote:
The real question is this: Can you call it cheating if it's done through a glory hole?


That made me think of this.

I wish they would make new episodes. Smiley: frown
#11 Aug 31 2006 at 5:23 PM Rating: Excellent
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#12 Aug 31 2006 at 5:48 PM Rating: Good
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DSD wrote:
I swear to Bob if I hear women are strapping ****** to the flat daddy to pretend they're still around, I say get the straight jackets fast.



I wouldn't be surprised. It's quite common for the deployed members to be getting sex toys in their care packages. Haven't sent one to the hubby because his shop loves the care packages I send out and they always crowd around him when he's opening it to see what I've sent that time. I would hate to have him pull out a pocket pussy in front of 20 guys.
#13 Aug 31 2006 at 5:52 PM Rating: Decent
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This sounds familiar; I believe Katie posted something similar a few years ago.

My question: Does Flat Daddy have a pop-up ***** for conjugal duty?
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#14 Aug 31 2006 at 5:53 PM Rating: Decent
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Thumbelyna wrote:
I would hate to have him pull out a pocket pussy in front of 20 guys.



Sheesh, some men are so lazy. Whatever happened to just jerkin it? I would feel like a fool trying to make it with a rubber/latex handheld ******.

Edited, Aug 31st 2006 at 6:53pm EDT by Paskil
#15 Aug 31 2006 at 5:56 PM Rating: Good
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The Paskil of Doom wrote:
Sheesh, some men are so lazy. Whatever happened to just jerkin it? I would feel like a fool trying to make it with a rubber/latex handheld ******.


I know this is going to be a TMI, but I don't care. Hubby's told me that the racks (read--bunk beds stacked 3 high) have curtains and some of the guys don't realize that the curtains are a tad on the thin side, so uh.... at times, you can SEE what they're doing behind closed curtains. Smiley: laugh
#16 Aug 31 2006 at 6:08 PM Rating: Decent
I'm not surprised. A guy at work keeps a life-sized cutout of himself standing up in his own office.
#17 Aug 31 2006 at 6:11 PM Rating: Good
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hmmm I wonder why Smiley: dubious
#18 Aug 31 2006 at 11:05 PM Rating: Good


Uuuugghh. I used to have a photo of my husband behind my visor in my car so that I could look at it if I was sad. That was during most of the Iraq deployment. Also, same deployment, I had a picture of us on the nightstand, and I would look at it and cry, etc. This time, however, I am just.....whatever. I am so apathetic about the whole thing it is a bit weird. I am still sad if I miss his calls, but in my day to day life, I just ignore it. I can watch a war movie and just shrug. Every once in a blue moon I get sad, but it is rare. Strangely, we were talking in a class about how a traumatic experience like war effects the brain, and I almost had to walk out. It is odd what affects me sometimes.

The upshot of this is, first deployment, if I was going about my daily business, I didn't need a picture around of him because if I had it I would be crying constantly. Now, I don't need it because I have become very strangely used to it. I find the whole flat daddy thing very, very weird.


(5 months to go!!!!!!!!)

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