Osama bin LadenFollow

NEW YORK -- Sudanese poet and novelist Kola Boof, who claims to have been Osama bin Laden's sex slave, has written in her autobiography, "Diary of a Lost Girl," that the al-Qaida leader was obsessed with Whitney Houston.

The New York Post quoted Boof as saying bin Laden told her Houston was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. Boof said he even talked about spending a lot of money to go to the U.S. and meet her. She said he wanted to give Houston a mansion and he'd be willing to break his color rule and make her one of his wives. As for Houston's husband Bobby Brown, Boof said bin Laden talked about having him killed. She said bin Laden believed Houston was "truly Islamic" but had been "brainwashed by American culture and by her husband.

Saving All My Love For You
A few stolen moments is all that we share
You've got your terrorists, and they need you there
Though I try to resist, being last on your list
But no other goat ******'s gonna do
So I'm saving all my love for you

It's not very easy, living all alone
My friends try and tell me, find a jihad of my own
But each time I try, I just break down and cry
'Cause I'd rather be home feeling blue
So I'm savin' all my love for you

You used to tell me we'd run away together
Love gives you the right to be free
You said be patient, just wait a little longer
But that's just an old fantasy

I've got to get ready, just a few minutes more
Gonna get that old feeling when you walk through that door
'Cause tonight is the night, for feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So I'm saving all my love
Yeah I'm saving all my love
Yes I'm saving all my love for you

A few minutes more 'til you walk through the door
No other woman, is gonna love you more
'Cause tonight is the night, that I'm feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So I'm saving all my love
Yeah I'm saving all my love
Yes I'm saving all my love for you
For you, for you

See? Bin Laden can't be all that bad if he wants to ice that pimple on popular culture's a$$, Bobby Brown. Perhaps if we offer up both Houston and Brown he'll go away forever...

Totem

Nah, he wears a dress.

Michael Scheuer, who once headed the CIA's bin Laden unit, says bin Laden has been given permission by a young cleric in Saudi Arabia authorizing al Qaeda to "use nuclear weapons against the United States ... capping the casualties at 10 million."

"He's had an approval, a religious approval for 10 million deaths?" I asked him.

"Yes," Scheuer responded.
From CNN.

Quick! Everybody put on their Whitney Houston mask! That'll keep Osama too busy whacking off to light off the nuke!

Totem

Oh, is it that time of the month again for Totem to bother us with another bin Laden/ Middle East diatibe/ corny joke? How fun.

Hey chulo, you doan have time to be yukking it up on this board, amigo. The landscaping business ain't that good. You'd be better served spending your available minutes trimmin' my bushes and using those Mexican bagpipes to get those stray blades of grass off my driveway. YouknowwhatI'msayin', muchacho? Tips aren't given for poking fun of your employers, ese.

Totem

Wonder how old that information is. Does he still want her and her cracked out ways? Crack is a funny word. Makes people do funny things, like Bobby Brown. Guess he can have her, in his heaven with all the (opps I said "Other") virgins.



for more information on this subject and many others, tune in late night.




Edited, Aug 23rd 2006 at 6:45pm EDT by SothsayerAtlantis