I am almost through cleansing my eyes. The vision of 60 year old pasty fat men in speedos still taints my vision.
In all honesty, how is the speedo passed off as typical swimwear overseas? Blah blah blah culture, oh noez1!1 not American, etc etc. they are fUcking hideous.
Trip was fun though regardless, plenty of drinks, sun and beach.
Highlight of the vacation; taking a 96' boat to a deserted island in 5-6' swells. 50 people on board, 40 of them euro-trash. Dressed to a T with pressed chinos, see through track pants (figure that one out) aviator glasses, porsche popped collar polos, etc. Obviously not dressed for the occasion. Puking all over the side of the boat for 1.5 hours.
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Nut HuggersFollow
Proper term is Banana Hammock.
Bode - 100 Holy Paladin - Lightbringer
Hey, they're Europeans! Just be happy they had anything on at all.
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
Princess Tare wrote:
Hey, they're Europeans! Just be happy they had anything on at all.
I saw one topless sun bather from a distance. Some blonde Dutch chick. Some of the guys had rolls covering the majority of their "packages" so they looked naked.
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
Some of the guys had rolls covering the majority of their "packages" so they looked naked.
Hawt!
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
Princess Tare wrote:
Hey, they're Europeans! Just be happy they had anything on at all.
I saw one topless sun bather from a distance. Some blonde Dutch chick. Some of the guys had rolls covering the majority of their "packages" so they looked naked.
hey! it's early, give a girl a break! No posting this crap until after lunch!
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Now that I'm officially fat...I'm buying a banana hammock and hitting the beach.
No one will ever know I am wearing it!
No one will ever know I am wearing it!
You might wanna avoid Miami Beach, Sora.
There seem to be a set of unwritten laws of nature that apply to sunbathing in the Mediterranean:
Sad but true.
- If you're under 40, the only topless sunbathers you'll see are 250lb German HausFraus with their saggy tits tucked in their shorts
- If you're over 40, the topless girls are all 19 with jubblies like pert apricots
- You can spot american guys a mile away. They're the ones looking at the girls through binoculars from 6 feet away
- American girls never get 'em out for the lads
Sad but true.
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless. The resort had a designated beach for it. No one from our resort took part in topless fun and thats a good thing, lots and lots of saggy 50 year olds whose BIKINIS leave nothing to the imagination.
Now the dozen or so co-ed softball players from the states that showed up on Sunday would have been a different story.
Now the dozen or so co-ed softball players from the states that showed up on Sunday would have been a different story.
Nexa wrote:
I saw one topless sun bather from a distance. Some blonde Dutch chick. Some of the guys had rolls covering the majority of their "packages" so they looked naked.
hey! it's early, give a girl a break! No posting this crap until after lunch!
hey! it's early, give a girl a break! No posting this crap until after lunch!
/ditto But actually my imagination is now scarred.
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Jophiel wrote:
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
I got engaged a month ago, I never get to see em now.
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I got engaged a month ago, I won't get to see em now until she has a kid hanging off of 'em.
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Jophiel wrote:
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
I would love to go topless, except I have a feeling I would end up with tan lines right over my naughty bits in the shape of Jophed's hands.The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
I would love to go topless, except I have a feeling I would end up with tan lines right over my naughty bits in the shape of Jophed's hands.You say that like it's a bad thing
At least, if it were me and my g/f, I'd make a point of doing that in the most enjoyable way possible
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
I would love to go topless, except I have a feeling I would end up with tan lines right over my naughty bits in the shape of Jophed's hands.'But honey, they were looking at you!'
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
Jophiel wrote:
Soracloud, King of Bards wrote:
I was extremely close to getting the Mrs. to go topless.
In that situation, my plan would be to find a way to visit the beach but make sure the Mrs's top stays on.
I would love to go topless, except I have a feeling I would end up with tan lines right over my naughty bits in the shape of Jophed's hands.!!!!Quote:
Nut Huggers
Unless of course, you cant see the sea. Then they are known as 'pants','grots', 'kecks', or 'grundies'. (ok I know you can see the sea in the last one, but only just)
"If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders". Carlin.
20 posts
Quote:
There seem to be a set of unwritten laws of nature that apply to sunbathing in the Mediterranean:
If you're under 40, the only topless sunbathers you'll see are 250lb German HausFraus with their saggy tits tucked in their shorts
If you're over 40, the topless girls are all 19 with jubblies like pert apricots
You can spot american guys a mile away. They're the ones looking at the girls through binoculars from 6 feet away
American girls never get 'em out for the lads
If you're under 40, the only topless sunbathers you'll see are 250lb German HausFraus with their saggy tits tucked in their shorts
If you're over 40, the topless girls are all 19 with jubblies like pert apricots
You can spot american guys a mile away. They're the ones looking at the girls through binoculars from 6 feet away
American girls never get 'em out for the lads
That seems the way it goes. When I was in Ukraine (US Marine on active duty so I appoligize for the bad grammer and spelling that is about to insue(Yes I know "Mediterranean" but it's Europe)) all I saw was old guys and girls in scantily clad bathing suits. My fellow Marines and I would walk up and down the beach look for the most concetrated are of hotties, in which we were only successful on the first day.
And not only are we easy to spot gawking at the girls but we seem to be the only ones that wear board shorts.
Get this though. One of my buddies felt it necasary to purchase a banana hammock. Every year (It's a tradition now) he puts it on during our 2 weeks of active duty (Reservists) and runs through the entire company when gathered. This year he ran straight passed our First Seargent and he wanted him to do it in front of our CO Major Bruce.... Major Bruce never showed up.
paulsol wrote:
Budgie or Budgerigar means parakeet and is an Aboriginal word for "good to eat"
kinda creepy
smuggling parakeets.
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