Pleasing Your Man the 50's WayFollow

http://www.sonic.net/~paul/humour/msg00254.html

The sad part about this is, it was a serious article.

SUBJECT: Pleasing Your Man the 50's Way

How to be the perfect woman.
This was taken from a 1950's Home Economics textbook

THE "FASCINATING WOMANHOOD" WAY TO WELCOME A MAN WHEN HE COMES HOME FROM
WORK

GET YOUR WORK DONE: Plan your tasks with an eye of the clock. Finish or
interrupt them an hour before he is expected. Your anguished cry, "Are you
home already?" is not exactly a warm welcome.

HAVE DINNER READY: Plan ahead, even the night before to have a delicious
meal, on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been
thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry
when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm
welcome needed.

PREPARE YOURSELF: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he
arrives. This will also make you happy to see him instead of too tired to
care. Turn off the worry and be glad to be alive and grateful for the man
who is going to walk in. While you are resting you can be thinking about
your F.W. assignment and all you can do to make him happy and give his
spirits a lift. When you arise, take care of your appearance. Touch up
your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just
been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more
interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

CLEAR AWAY THE CLUTTER: Make one last trip through the main part of the
house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys,
paper, etc. in a bucket or wastebasket and put them in the back bedroom for
sorting later. Then run a dustcloth over the tables. Your husband will
feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift
too. Having the house in order is another way of letting him know that you
care and have planned for this homecoming.

PREPARE THE CHILDREN: Take just a few minutes to wash the children's hands
and faces (if they are small) comb their hair, and if necessary change their
clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them look the
part.

MINIMIZE ALL NOISE: Especially give heed to this if your husband has to join
rush hour traffic. At the time of his arrival eliminate noise of washer,
dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet at
the time of their father's arrival. Let them be a little noisy beforehand
to get it out of their system.

BE HAPPY TO SEE HIM: Greet him with a warm smile and act glad to see him.
Tell him that it is good to have him home. This may make his day
worthwhile. If there is any romance left in you, he needs it now.

SOME DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems and complaints. Solve the
problems you can before he gets home and save those you must discuss with
him until later in the evening. Also, don't complain if he is late for
dinner. Count this as a minor problem when compared with what he might have
gone through that day. Don't allow the children to rush at him with problems
or requests. Allow them to briefly greet their father but save demands for
later.

MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE: Have him lean back into a comfortable chair or
suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for
him. Arrange his pillow and offer to massage his neck and shoulders and
take off his shoes. Don't insist on this however. Turn on music if it is
one of his pleasures. Speak in a soft, soothing, pleasant voice. Allow him
to relax - to unwind.

LISTEN TO HIM: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of
his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first, then he will be a more
responsive listener later.

MAKE THE EVENING HIS: Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner
or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world
of strain and pressure, his need to be home and to relax. If he is cross or
irritable, never fight back. Again, try to understand his world of strain.

THE GOAL: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your
husband can renew himself in body and spirit. Then add to this the
application of all the principles of Fascinating Womanhood and your husband
**will want to come home** (that's in italics) He will rather be with you
than with anyone else in the world and will spend whatever time he can
possibly spare with you. Try living all of these rules for his homecoming
and see what happens. This is the way to bring a man home to your side, not
by pressure, persuasion or moral obligation.

What makes this a serious article? He can't really believe it's serious, can he? Surely not.

Stop calling me Shirley!

Airplane! What a movie. Though your reply deserves a C-.

~Blix

Hey aren't you the guy with the backwards named sock...haha Kao or Dana ripped that sock a new one.

ToDxnoM?