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#1 Jun 15 2006 at 9:08 AM Rating: Decent
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The Great public speaker at work. Full Story

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WASHINGTON -
President Bush, who often teases members of the White House press corps, apologized Wednesday after he poked fun at a reporter for wearing sunglasses without realizing they were needed for vision loss.
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The exchange occurred at a news conference in the Rose Garden.

Bush called on Los Angeles Times reporter Peter Wallsten and asked if he was going to ask his question with his "shades" on.

"For the viewers, there's no sun," Bush said to the television cameras.

But even though the sun was behind the clouds, Wallsten still needs the sunglasses because he has Stargardt's disease, a form of macular degeneration that causes progressive vision loss. The condition causes Wallsten to be sensitive to glare and even on a cloudy day, can cause pain and increase the loss of sight.

Wallsten said Bush called his cell phone later in the day to apologize and tell him that he didn't know he had the disease. Wallsten said he interrupted and told the president that no apology was necessary and that he didn't feel offended since he hadn't told anyone at the White House about his condition.

"He said, `I needle you guys out of affection,'" Wallsten said. "I said, 'I understand that, but I don't want you to treat me any differently because of this.'"

Wallsten said the president said he would not treat him differently, so Wallsten encouraged him to "needle away."

"He said, `I will. Next time I'll just use a different needle,'" Wallsten said.

Wallsten said he thought that was a pretty good line. And his only complaint is that the president didn't answer his question at the news conference.

Wallsten, who is also author of a book coming out next month titled "One Party Country: The Republican Plan for Dominance in the 21st Century," had asked about White House credibility now in the aftermath of top aide Karl Rove having been cleared in the
CIA leak investigation. But Bush said he wouldn't comment with another top White House aide still facing prosecution in the case.
#2 Jun 15 2006 at 9:21 AM Rating: Good
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I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Watch you weave
Then breathe your story lines
And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Keep track of the visions in my eyes
#3 Jun 15 2006 at 9:27 AM Rating: Decent
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One time back in 8th grade I was joking around and asked this kid in my class why he was walking around like he had a 2x4 stuck up his ***. I thought he was just sore or something. He explained that a year before he had a terrible accident and had to have a fake hip put in.

I felt like an ***.

#4 Jun 15 2006 at 9:34 AM Rating: Good
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We were on the schoolbus when I was in grade 10 one day and these two young girls were taking forever in the aisle and the bus wouldnt move until everyone was sitting. My one friend yelled 'hurry the f[Aqua][/Aqua]uck up what are you a cripple?' which is exactly when the first girl sat down and we saw the second girl clearly who was indeed a cripple.

Good times
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#5 Jun 15 2006 at 9:47 AM Rating: Good
I was using the public bathroom in south station (Boston) once. There is a line of about 8 urinals and I was at the last one doing my business. Someone bumps into me from behind and I **** on my hand. I turn around and say, "WTF dude, what are you ****** blind, you can't see me here."

I look up and he has a blind man's cane and is wearing sunglasses. I felt like the biggest looser ever. I just pissed on my hand and barked at a blind man...
#6 Jun 15 2006 at 10:27 AM Rating: Decent
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One time in 10th grade Spanish II, I remarked that my parent's had died in a car accident when asked why I looked tired one morning. The girl asking actually lost both of her parents a year ago and was not impressed. We ended up dating for a year or so until I tried to get her to touch the peepee. Upon learning the sheer mass of my member, she was immediately frightened for her life and she ran. She ran so far away.
#7 Jun 15 2006 at 1:40 PM Rating: Default
A few months ago I was at the Court House doing some research and a van pulls up next to me. Out gets a lady (driver) and an old man (passanger) and the old mans door slams in to my car. I get out just a bit[red][/red]chin' and the man turns around gives me the finger! In his other hand, a damn blind cane.

#8 Jun 15 2006 at 1:57 PM Rating: Good
Ministry of Silly Cnuts
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Recently I accused a poster here of being a fu[/Aqua]cktard, only to find out that they had in fact been diagnosed with fu[Aqua]cktardism in real life.

Well, ok, many times.
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#9 Jun 15 2006 at 2:04 PM Rating: Decent
One time I broke a chair in class and just as I was leaving the teacher basically shouted out what kind of fat *** does it take to break these chairs...

It's not as funny when your on the other side...
#10 Jun 15 2006 at 2:14 PM Rating: Good
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Sassythief the Pest wrote:
One time I broke a chair in class and just as I was leaving the teacher basically shouted out what kind of fat *** does it take to break these chairs...

It's not as funny when your on the other side...

So, you're Codyy, not Jawbox then?
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we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#11 Jun 15 2006 at 2:17 PM Rating: Decent
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Debalic wrote:
Sassythief the Pest wrote:
One time I broke a chair in class and just as I was leaving the teacher basically shouted out what kind of fat *** does it take to break these chairs...

It's not as funny when your on the other side...

So, you're Codyy, not Jawbox then?

Seconded!

#12 Jun 15 2006 at 2:22 PM Rating: Default
Is Codyy fat? I think he lives with his Grandma or something, I live with my dad.
#13 Jun 15 2006 at 2:24 PM Rating: Decent
Sassythief the Pest wrote:
Is Codyy fat? I think he lives with his Grandma or something, I live with my dad.
Your dad is Coddy's grandma? Smiley: confused
#14 Jun 15 2006 at 6:38 PM Rating: Good
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Professor CrescentFresh wrote:
Sassythief the Pest wrote:
Is Codyy fat? I think he lives with his Grandma or something, I live with my dad.
Your dad is Coddy's grandma?


Don't laugh. I knew a guy who's dad was actually his mom. Or was it the other way around? Anyway, there was a sex change operation involved. That's about all I really needed or wanted to know (never met the person directly).

The guy was pretty much totally screwed up too. One of those people you talk to for about 5 minutes and say: "Yup. Not hanging around too much with this guy. He's destined to be a CSI case, and I don't want to be nearby when it happens..."
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#15 Jun 15 2006 at 6:53 PM Rating: Good
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Most people know that I adopted my husband's sons a few years ago. But one guy didn't. He asked my husband "So how come your ex doesn't see your kids? Must be a total bi[azure][/azure]tch." To which my husband told the guy "Nope, my first wife died from breast cancer when the youngest was a baby." The guy felt like such a heel.
#16 Jun 15 2006 at 6:58 PM Rating: Good
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One time I said this thing to this guy. It turns out I was right. It was so cool. He still hates me.
#17 Jun 15 2006 at 7:20 PM Rating: Good
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The number of things I've said in my life that I truly regret are few and far between, and I say a lot of nasty things. In fact, I can only recall one thing I've said that even brings a twinge of remorse to my heart.

After a long night of drinking with an old friend, I was staggering down this ramp out the front of his house. Thoroughly inebriated, I proceeded to inquire as to the need for a '****** ramp' when everyone that lived there had perfectly functioning legs. Turns out that his younger brother had been born with some form of disease that normal people would easily consider 'retarded' and died at the age of 15. Biggest piece of **** ever.

Just to put it in perspective, other nasty things I've said that I still find amusing include:

*********** if I was your father I'd have killed myself too." ~ To someone who's father shot himself in the face.

"Now I understand why your parents beat you when you were little." ~ To a person who was physically abused as a child.
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