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I want your soul!Follow

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#1 Jun 11 2006 at 2:34 PM Rating: Excellent
Jophiel
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And I'll pay good money for it.

I will pay you $100 to sign a contract giving me complete control and ownership of your soul to do with as I please. Keep it, sell it, torture it -- it's mine to express my whims upon. A la The Simpsons, it does not matter to me whether or not YOU believe in your soul or its existance only that you sign the document in good faith and knowledge that you are transferring its possession to me. I've checked with all the world's various spiritual leaders and they agreed that such a contract would indeed be binding in the eyes of whatever higher power may exist.

Also, per another episodes of The Simpsons, there will be no loopholes or previous arrangements to break you of this contract. I will, for all spiritual purposes, own your soul should you agree to the terms.
Do we have a deal?
Sure! Easy $100 for me!:27 (37.0%)
I think I'll keep my soul, if that's okay:46 (63.0%)
Total:73
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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#2 Jun 11 2006 at 2:36 PM Rating: Good
__DEL__1624234683084
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Please deposit $100 to my paypal account please. Smiley: wink
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#3 Jun 11 2006 at 2:38 PM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
Also, per another episodes of The Simpsons, there will be no loopholes or previous arrangements to break you of this contract. I will, for all spiritual purposes, own your soul should you agree to the terms.


There are always ways to get out of a contract. And if I have problems I'll just hire niobia's lawyer Smiley: lol
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#4 Jun 11 2006 at 2:47 PM Rating: Excellent
Jophiel
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baelnic the Braindead wrote:
There are always ways to get out of a contract.
Since it's my hypothetical, there's not.

If you want ways out, start your own thread Smiley: grin
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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#5 Jun 11 2006 at 2:51 PM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
If you want ways out, start your own thread


Hey I'm just trying to drum up some business for niobia's lawyer. That guy can't even afford an office, only a small space on the interweb.
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#6 Jun 11 2006 at 2:53 PM Rating: Good
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If I never recieve the $100 you don't get my soul right?
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#7 Jun 11 2006 at 3:44 PM Rating: Excellent
Kaolian
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How much would you give me for the soul of this endangered giant African condor instead?
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#8 Jun 11 2006 at 5:23 PM Rating: Decent
Debalic
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I could definately use the hundred bucks, but you'll have to talk to the other guy who's got claim to my soul. You know, Him.
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
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#9 Jun 11 2006 at 5:27 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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I can't give you my soul... semms I have already sold it to the devil.
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#10 Jun 11 2006 at 5:36 PM Rating: Good
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Darqflame wrote:
I can't give you my soul... semms I have already sold it to the devil.


Darqflame wrote:
Yep, I am Nobby's *****.


So that makes you Nobby's soulless *****! Smiley: lol

Edited, Jun 11th 2006 at 5:46pm EST by baelnic
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#11 Jun 11 2006 at 5:48 PM Rating: Good
Thumbelyna
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baelnic the Braindead wrote:
Darqflame wrote:
I can't give you my soul... semms I have already sold it to the devil.


Darqflame wrote:
Yep, I am Nobby's *****.


So that makes you Nobby's soulless *****! Smiley: lol



Smiley: laugh You beat me to saying that. Darn you! Smiley: glare
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#12 Jun 11 2006 at 5:51 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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I have always been a soulless *****, only thing that has changed is my affiliation with Nobby.
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#13 Jun 11 2006 at 5:52 PM Rating: Decent
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Mmmmm soulless bi[aqua][/aqua]tchess Smiley: inlove

Edited, Jun 11th 2006 at 5:52pm EST by johnnny
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#14 Jun 11 2006 at 5:55 PM Rating: Good
Nobby
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Mistress Darqflame wrote:
I have always been a soulless *****, only thing that has changed is my affiliation with Nobby.
I've told you DF. . . If I'm asleep at the time, it doesn't count as 'affiliation' Smiley: wink2
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#15 Jun 11 2006 at 5:57 PM Rating: Excellent
Darqflame
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Nobby wrote:
Mistress Darqflame wrote:
I have always been a soulless *****, only thing that has changed is my affiliation with Nobby.
I've told you DF. . . If I'm asleep at the time, it doesn't count as 'affiliation' Smiley: wink2


Uh, you know, I have kept track of the times that you have slept, and that ain't much! Smiley: sly Who has changed their sleeping schedule to coincide with who elses?
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#16 Jun 11 2006 at 9:06 PM Rating: Good
Iamadam
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You can have my soul when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
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#17 Jun 11 2006 at 10:45 PM Rating: Decent
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Please take it. You can keep your money. Just more hassle for you.
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#18 Jun 11 2006 at 10:54 PM Rating: Decent
Jawbox
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I decline. You can call me an agnostic unless we're talking six figures at least.

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#19 Jun 12 2006 at 3:45 AM Rating: Good
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Hell, i'll take the 100. My soul is all yours.

btw, do I get an extra 100 per soul for the voices in my head?
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#20 Jun 12 2006 at 3:48 AM Rating: Good
trickybeck
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Only if you've washed your hands first, Joph.


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#21 Jun 12 2006 at 8:30 AM Rating: Excellent
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boxerblue wrote:
Please take it. You can keep your money. Just more hassle for you.


Emo kid. Smiley: oyvey
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#22 Jun 12 2006 at 8:34 AM Rating: Good
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Jawbox wrote:
I decline. You can call me an agnostic unless we're talking six figures at least.


pfft, 6? I want 12, leaning more towards the 13 mark in terms of actual amount >_>
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#23 Jun 12 2006 at 8:52 AM Rating: Decent
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Sure, I will sell you 300 of my souls. I can just go buy them much cheaper in bulk at the site listed above!

Edited, Jun 12th 2006 at 9:16am EST by Proroc
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#24 Jun 12 2006 at 8:58 AM Rating: Good
Nadenu
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Selling ones soul for money is so 80's.

What about I sell you mine for, say... Fruit Loops! Yeah!
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#25 Jun 12 2006 at 9:53 AM Rating: Decent
Debalic
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Nadenu wrote:
Selling ones soul for money is so 80's.

What about I sell you mine for, say... Fruit Loops! Yeah!

It says here that you sold your soul for half a Mallomar in 1983...
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
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#26 Jun 12 2006 at 11:07 AM Rating: Good
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Deballic wrote:
It says here that you sold your soul for half a Mallomar in 1983...


Damn, I had forgotten about that. Here I had Nadenu's Soul stuck in a jar in the closet this whole time, right on top of a stack of old Penthouse Magazines.

Perhaps I should sell it, and throw in the story of what she did for the other half of the Mallomar. Smiley: wink2 Oh the good times.

Edited, Jun 12th 2006 at 11:19am EST by fhrugby
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