This is the true story about a number of online hooligans who form a get-together in the fare city of Boston. The following events are described as seen thru the eyes of Exo.
I arrived in Boston after a uneventful plane ride, my only complaint was the fat woman who was taking up my armrest and smelled like nachos. I checked into my hotel and soon after met up with the others, we had a nice dinner out, fun talk, not unlike the asylum but less flaming and more beer. Then we decided to go to the bar...
I awake the next afternoon with a splitting headache, I can not recall the events of the night before but as I look around I find I am back in my hotel room I am laying half way across the couch and I am missing 3/5ths of my shirt as well as ½ of my pants, I smell of cheap liquor. On the bed DSD and Nexa are asleep naked, DSD is wearing a sombrero and a fake handlebar moustache. Nexa has a yamaka, a monocle and a empty bottle of scotch.
I survey the room in my daze and find more bodies, Nobby is passed out and handcuffed to a lawn chair, missing one pant leg a fresh tattoo of president bush dressed as batman can be seen. In the center of the room lies a patch work server made from my laptop and part of the hotel lamp. Dana is asleep next to it wearing a construction workers tool belt with the initials B.T. and talking in his sleep, I think I heard him say “Fuck you cluster 7, I make my own clusters!â€
Flea is under the bed, wearing bowling shoes and clutching a 7 iron. Her back pocket is full of guys telephone numbers and a 3 sets of car keys and one pink golf ball. There is blood and fur caked to the head of the club. Jophiel is slumped outside ageist the balcony railing, wearing a blood stained shirt and holding a .45 in the left hand, and a parking ticket in the other.
A live goat wanders by
Jacobsdeception is asleep on the table, also on the table lies: a salt shaker, a book of matches, 2 tickets to the zoo, a police badge and a live gerbil. Smash can be found under the table with more empty bottles of beer than thought could be humanly possible to consume. To his left is a Chinese hooker named Mi Ping. Kelv is in the corner clutching a suitcase full of money and an airport tag in a foreign language. He is wearing a ninja mask, cowboy hat and a revolver with 3 spent shells is on his waste.
Mi Ping and the Goat leave the room after offering me a customary “hehe! Love you long time! 5$†I declined.
I find a note on the floor, it is written in magazine letters cut out and pasted on. It reads: “Bring us the $500,000 or you can find Johnnny at the bottom of the harborâ€. I decided to get the hell out of here and took nothing but what was left of my clothes and $500 from Kelv’s suitcase to pay for a plane ticket. I find Yanari in the hallway outside the room in the fetal position, eyes wide open and bloodshot mumbling something about there being blood everywhere. I didn’t care, I wanted to get the hell home, cut my cable wires and throw my computer out the window so this could never happen again.
Shortly after this note was found Exo’s plane went down after a fat woman’s seat broke and she rolled down the isle. The piolets were killed on impact and the plane crashed shortly after. The last words on the black box were “Do you smell nachos?â€
Edited, Wed May 3 17:00:43 2006 by bbking