Story time.
So I was working as a PharmTech in college at a high volume drug store. We filled a couple hundred perscriptions a day. I often helped (with pharmacist supervision) people with questions about dosage, usage, and other questions.
One day I was helping a father fill a perscription for his daughter. I glanced at the name of the girl and couldn't quite figure out how to pronounce it correctly and didn't want to upset anyone, I just used the last name. The father comes up to pick it up and I ask him how to pronounce ....
Climydia
..
...
....
And low and behold he says back to me, "Chlamydia (at least that's how I heard it) ... like the flower"
Apparently his daughter was 8 at the time I filled the script. Now she'd be around 17 and I can't imagine how nice a time she's having in the dating scene.
Baelnic
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Oh yeah, I also went to school with a girl named Tarantula.
A good way to give your child a good head start in the world is to give your child's naming rights to a corporation in exchange for money which you can later use for a college tuition.
Pretty low, but not a bad idea.
Pretty low, but not a bad idea.
Churchess can't generate names on their own? :o
I ended up as Brian Harrison, Brian after my dad, Harrison after...I can't recall, something about my mother wanting to name me after some smoo actor that used to be in action movies. =/
Or do I recall? Muhahahaha...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Or do I recall? Muhahahaha...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
You can't mention baby names without bringing up this gem.
Mistress PsychoJester wrote:
You can't mention baby names without bringing up this gem.
Born to be a statistic, and named between massive bong hits, I'd say the kids got NO future.
Sir Weebs wrote:
...and named between massive bong hits...
I spoke recently with a woman named Marijuana Williams, same spelling and pronunciation.
But the winner in my personal experience was ****** Johnson, pronounced Vajeena, according to her. I still hold that ****** Johnson sounds like a great moniker for a trannie.
People in Detroit name their kids the darndest things.
I think it's time we just switched to numbers.
The very next kid born gets to be 1.
The very next kid born gets to be 1.
Alma wrote:
I lost my post
I once knew a guy called Timothy Donohue 
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Nobby wrote:
I once knew a guy called Timothy Donohue
You're making that up! Noone could be so cruel!
Nexa
“It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But a half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor.â€
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Nexa wrote:
Nobby wrote:
I once knew a guy called Timothy Donohue
You're making that up! Noone could be so cruel!
Timothy Donohue wrote:
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. Fu[i][/i]ck off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
Old times, baby. Old times.
"I started out with nothin' and I still got most of it left" - Seasick Steve
Timothy Donohue wrote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That was really funny.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That was really funny.
[20:55] Darqflame: <3 U2 Kupo
Be Jealous
[14:24] nLoD: so it can't be all that hard can it?!
14:25] Pikko: obviously for magi it was really hard.. all the time
WoW: Retired
Uncleleo - 80 Undead Warlock Earthen Ring
Kishio - 80 Blood Elf Priest Earthen Ring
Elainebennis - 80 Blood Elf Death Knight Gul'dan
EQ2: Retired
Ishio - 80 Kerran Shadowknight - Crushbone
Ishiu - 26 Ogre Defiler - Crushbone
Ishias - 36 Conjy - Crushbone
Nerstinna - 16 Warden - Crushbone
>:3
Be Jealous
[14:24] nLoD: so it can't be all that hard can it?!
14:25] Pikko: obviously for magi it was really hard.. all the time
WoW: Retired
Uncleleo - 80 Undead Warlock Earthen Ring
Kishio - 80 Blood Elf Priest Earthen Ring
Elainebennis - 80 Blood Elf Death Knight Gul'dan
EQ2: Retired
Ishio - 80 Kerran Shadowknight - Crushbone
Ishiu - 26 Ogre Defiler - Crushbone
Ishias - 36 Conjy - Crushbone
Nerstinna - 16 Warden - Crushbone
>:3
My aunt was a social worker for years.
She told the story of the child named Female` Jones. The mother said that when the child was brought to her in her room, she had a bracelet on and had already been named.
There was also the case of the twins Limejello and Oranjello.
If I should decide to inflict the world with my progeny, I intend to just do the easy thing and name him after myself. I'm 4 generations deep in this particular name; no reason he can't suffer through being the 5th.
She told the story of the child named Female` Jones. The mother said that when the child was brought to her in her room, she had a bracelet on and had already been named.
There was also the case of the twins Limejello and Oranjello.
If I should decide to inflict the world with my progeny, I intend to just do the easy thing and name him after myself. I'm 4 generations deep in this particular name; no reason he can't suffer through being the 5th.
Aadynn Litefoot wrote:
and yes i know that Brandi is spelled differently then the drink.
Nonsense. It's stripper-friendly!
Jophiel wrote:
Anyone ever heard that stupid radio PSA ad where a couple female workers are talking and one says that another co-worker had a baby and when asked its name says "She gave it one of those names. Like Shaneequa or Jenauqua. You know what I mean..." and the other, in a touching moment of racial understanding, pointedly says "No... I don't know what you mean."?
First off, STFU Co-Worker Number Two. You may not agree with #1's sentiments but you know exactly what she means. Not too many white folks out there are naming their kids Shaneequa. Take your passive-aggression and stuff it up your ***.
First off, STFU Co-Worker Number Two. You may not agree with #1's sentiments but you know exactly what she means. Not too many white folks out there are naming their kids Shaneequa. Take your passive-aggression and stuff it up your ***.
Maybe her name is Shaquanda, and she really doesn't know what the hell one of "those" names is. It's all perspective.
Jophiel wrote:
As I've heard it told, and I'm not enthusiastic enough to reseach fully,...
Well, if not enthusisatic, "bored" works equally well. I don't know if Splash was the catalyst or not but 'Madison' first breaks into the Top 500 baby names in 1986 at #366 according to the Social Security office and climbs the charts from that point on.
Well, if not enthusisatic, "bored" works equally well. I don't know if Splash was the catalyst or not but 'Madison' first breaks into the Top 500 baby names in 1986 at #366 according to the Social Security office and climbs the charts from that point on.
If the Social Security Administration's website is your idea of fun, I can see where Googling "Splash" would bore you.
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
Maybe her name is Shaquanda, and she really doesn't know what the hell one of "those" names is.
Quote:
If the Social Security Administration's website is your idea of fun, I can see where Googling "Splash" would bore you. 
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Just a quick "Thank you!" to Joph for posting this gem. Gave me something to do at work.
My dad claims to have worked with a Harry Buttz. This guy had a kid. Who he named Harry Buttz jr.
I also know a guy named Ben Doing. As a result, he has heard the same joke millions of times.
Edited, Mon Jan 23 00:45:57 2006 by Taber
I also know a guy named Ben Doing. As a result, he has heard the same joke millions of times.
Edited, Mon Jan 23 00:45:57 2006 by Taber
This thread makes me frown.
I went to high school witha Crystal Natalie Taylor. And yes she really was a C_NT.
Jophiel wrote:
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
Maybe her name is Shaquanda, and she really doesn't know what the hell one of "those" names is.
Maybe her middle name is Shaquanda, her first name is Alice, and the first co-worker is wrong.
We can just cut to the chase here, where you admit I'm right.
Jophiel, who loves him some beaurecrats, wrote:
If the Social Security Administration's website is your idea of fun, I can see where Googling "Splash" would bore you.
...And the graphics are so much more exciting!
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
and the first co-worker is wrong
Likewise, if someone says "Shaquanda, Shaneequa... one of those names", I'd immediately understand that she was referring to some ethnic-sounding African American name. While it's perfectly valid to disagree with the implication that there's something "wrong" with an ethnic African american name (or a New-Age one or a trendy yuppy one or a Biblical one) as made obvious in the PSA by the inflection on "those", saying you "don't understand" what the speaker means is just a weak, passive-aggressive response when you want to say "WTF is wrong with Shaquanda?"
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Jophiel wrote:
The Glorious Atomicflea wrote:
and the first co-worker is wrong
Likewise, if someone says "Shaquanda, Shaneequa... one of those names", I'd immediately understand that she was referring to some ethnic-sounding African American name. While it's perfectly valid to disagree with the implication that there's something "wrong" with an ethnic African american name (or a New-Age one or a trendy yuppy one or a Biblical one) as made obvious in the PSA by the inflection on "those", saying you "don't understand" what the speaker means is just a weak, passive-aggressive response when you want to say "WTF is wrong with Shaquanda?"
You kill me. I didn't even read this, but I want to hug you just for the effort I know you put into writing it. You, sir, are Adorable.
He's even more adorable because he's right.
In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
Plus, I'm just adorable in general, right?
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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