Just another dayFollow

I can't be the only person who absolutely hates the holidays, can I?

How many times do I have to be reminded that people have family that they actually want to spend time with? I hate the looks I get when I say I'm spending the day alone. Ok, so I'm a complete failure at relationships and have managed to isolate myself. If you knew my family, you'd understand.

Or how about the weekly shopping trip that takes 3 times as long as it should because every idiot in town /needs/ to spend every penny they have on some meaningless bauble?

Or every damn sappy movie with perfect families, perfect meals, perfect lives? Why don't they ever show the fights, the tears, the sarcastic "thanks for making this a great <insert holiday name here>" comments?

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's... just another day on the calendar folks. January can't come soon enough, imo.

Bah.

I do hate the holidays. They've lost their meaning and it's pretty much based on obligation and spending.

For me, the holidays are free days off from work, which is a bonus, however, Holidays destroy what could be a full FFXI day of fun in my pajamas but instead, I'm stuck among my in-laws, dressed up, feeling bloated, and not buzzed enough.

Before I was married, I did the holidays alone, which I preferred. Then again, I did drag all my other friends over who hated their folks, and we had our own Non-Family Xmas/Thanksgiving, etc. It was a blast. I miss that.

Oh heck...I'll bite



No you are not. There is a syndrome named for it.



If they really deserve it, then ***** your natural family, ***** them right up the as[i][/i]s. You get to determine who you spend time with, and how much. If not now, maybe in the future you will want to associate with them, but you decide - and if their past behavior has ben eggregious, you may want to set conditions and be prepared to simply leave.



Well, perhaps these people care about you. Now maybe you can't have the holiday itself with them, but maybe you can have a get together on another day.



Unisolate yourself. Volunteer. You know what Al Gore does each Thanksgiving? Serve turkey to the homeless. And so can you. Some kind of organized religion may be useful to provide you with interaction with others. You don't have to be a sheep and drink their purple kool-aide, but some kind of virtuous community can help you; do it. If you prefer secular, try: http://national.unitedway.org/myuw/

A complete failure at relationships is suffering physical or emotional abuse on a daily basis because you lack courage to leave. You seem to have gotten out on your own (if I read your post correctly) ergo you are *not* a complete failure. That was the hard part - this next step is easier: find some people to spend some time with. There are tons of people out there. You won't find a personal savior to fulfill all your dreams - and no single person should be that for you.



They're making the economy go round. Let them. You're richer by contrast (at least) if you don't blow all your cash.



They knew it was a lie. They'd just fought WWII and really knew how cruel the world really was. They made these fluffy movies in part prayer, part fairy tale and part self hypnosis.



Actually, most of our media is rather more jaundiced now. We are more like the Simpsons then the Waltons - and we watch much more sarcastic TV then fluffy TV (at least in the US - you're milage may vary).

If your family is causing you fights and tears and making sacracstic comments, minimize your time with them and if it is bad, set groundrules. Be willing to leave.



Well, it does seem to have an impact on you. Acknowledge it first, then control it.

Lastly, having no persistent connections gives you great power: move, change jobs, change churches - get yourself in positive situations with people who are not hurting you.

I got out a long time ago, stood up, said "no", left the abuse behind. First marriage was a repeat, took me 15 months to figure it out. Second marriage lasted 12 years, turned into emotional abuse towards the end. I've been raising a child on my own ever since.

Most of the time, I'm good alone. Took a long time to find out who I am and what /I/ want, get my head on straight as it were. I just really hate this time of year. A bit of the past, a bit of SAD, short days, lonely nights... and I just want this season to be over.

Finding people who want to spend time with me is hard. I'm too needy, too abrasive, too demanding, too whatever. I realized a long time ago that I'm just not easy to live with. I have a way of pushing people away, even when it's the last thing I want to do.

Thanks for listening.

Merry Christmas to you sir!

The Only thing about the Holidays I hate is the goddamn s[b][/b]hitty music. It drives me crazy.