So this evening I get some conjunctivitis drops on the way home. My right eye is now a uniform red, and hurts even when I'm looking only through my left eye. So I take a cloth robe belt and tie it around my head, covering both eyes. I walk out of the bathroom, proclaiming to my girlfriend "I am Zatoichi, the blind samurai!" and proceed to step on a kitten and walk into her chair.
![Smiley: oyvey](http://zam.zamimg.com/i/smilies/oyvey.gif)