If you're married...Follow

Background and details:

My husband's first wife died from breast cancer. We met after she died, got married and for the most part, our marriage is a solid one. I adopted their two sons. The boys were very young when their mother passed away (4 1/2 years old and 10 months old). Biggest reason why I adopted them was because 1) I completely fell in love with those 2 little boys and 2) I didn't want them to think that they were just a package deal and I wanted them to realize that I wanted them too. My husband and I also had a baby girl together and I didn't want the boys to feel like they were lesser.

We've been married for almost 9 years and like I said, our marriage is generally a solid marriage. Have our ups and downs, but we work through our problems. Normal stuff.

My husband is in the Navy and he will be transferring to sea duty shortly. He's been on shore duty for the last 3 1/2 years which was nice because he got to spend time with me and our kids. Unfortunately, he's an avid gamer and his main hobby is staying home and playing video games. Sometimes with the kids, sometimes by himself. It hasn't bugged me because 1) he was home; and 2) he bonded with the kids over the games; and 3) I usually read a book next to him on the couch while he plays.

But for the past few months I've noticed that he is really starting to ignore me and the kids. He tells the kids to go watch TV upstairs because he's playing video games. I'll sitl next to him on the couch and he tells I need to move because I'm in the way of the controller's cord. He's still home, but doesn't talk with me like he used to because "we already are under same roof, why talk?", and when I've tried to talk with him just about every day stuff or about stuff I hear in the news it's "who gives a sh[i][/i]t? It doesn't affect us." At first I put it off to his work and him stressing about transferring to sea duty. But after awhile, things weren't improving so I've tried to talk with him about what I was feeling, it turned into "we spend time together, we sleep in the same bed."

That hurt my feelings so when I'm pissed/upset/sad, I stay quiet and distant myself for a bit. Which led to "we're married and you know you won't get a divorce so get over it."

Fidelity's not an issue. I know he's faithful. I don't even have to worry about an ex because she's dead and her family is in the Philippines and the boys really don't remember that they had a birth mom (the younger one definitely doesn't). The boys are mine and people are surprised to hear I adopted them because in all ironic reality, they look like me and not their dad.

So that's it in a nutshell. I'd kick him the nuts, but that won't solve the problem. It might be satisfying, but it's not a solution.

Something could be said about needing to bully others to feel good about oneself.

Remember every time your kid gets whupped at school that other kid feels good about himself. If you can do it why can't he?

Grade school would have been a lot more fun if people had just yelled "SLASH KICK" at me

Ya, but then you grew up to be an admin with infinate powers like the ability to give out custom titles and change peoples karma to 6.3...

hey if thats the only thing in your life that makes you feel good about yourself, Goodanya.

Dana, whats the capitol of Thailand?

Niobias every post is an abortion in text form. All the pro choice ppl on the forum thank you for your contribution Niobia!!

Edited, Mon Nov 7 17:05:05 2005 by bodhisattva

Abbreviated quoting;



I'm looking to take your advice. I haven't had a lot of luck meeting women my age that have never had an ex before. Should I start trolling the local highschools, or is it more cost-effective to press for an arranged marriage as soon as a girl reaches menarche?

You know I don't really see how any of this helps Thumb. Ya'll are a great group of friends, really.

Edited, Mon Nov 7 17:19:57 2005 by niobia

I'm pretty sure that Thumbelyna is laughing her *** off right now, enjoying her post.

Edited, Mon Nov 7 17:22:08 2005 by DSD

Dam gamers!

I would suggest seduction, sex, blow jobs, sex, backrub, sex.

If that kinda stuff doesn't draw him away from his games then youse got some trouble.

At this time, I would like to make a request. Please shove your head up your Furby. You're an annoying ****. I really don't feel like camping you down to below the filter, but I'd appreciate it if you would shut your piehole. Your posts are drivel, your fights are lame and your comebacks are seriously lacking... well, everything. I don't particularly enjoy your presence,

Seems from the original post the whole chatting strategy didn't work. (after 21 years of marriage I, too, have found chatting to be of little use)

Action, Man, she needs to take action!!

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