how oddFollow

Ever have someone in your life at some point who you not only hated (and I mean this in the strongest sense) but they hated you? Ever coe in contact with them years later? It's an odd feeling, to be sure.

Not getting into my whole life story, but I had a step mother who hated me more than anything. You know Cinderellas step mom? This woman could give her lessons. Over my life, until I was 13 or so, I had to deal with this cnut and she me. At 13 I left and never saw or heard from her again. It's now been 13 yars.

So a few minutes ago, I go to check my email and there's an email with my fathers email address. He and I rarely talk as well, but here and there we communicate to make sure the other is actually alive. So I open it up, thinking it's going to be a note asking if I am indeed alive and how my son is, when it's my step mother who wrote.

It was a terse, but polite letter asking about some up and coming family birthday party and she wanted to know if I was going so she could decide whether or not to go herself. She didn't want to stress the family with the two of us in the same room, knowing we'd kill each other. After asking, she mentioned how she saw pics of my son and how beautiful he was, how proud I must be.


While it was nothing to look at, I was completely floored that she actually took the time to sit there and figure out what to write. I'm laughing, just imgining her pulling her hair out, tying to sound somewhat nice. But while it was a small email, it was amzing how just a few simple words could bring back the hatred in just one moment, knowing who wrote it.


Has anyone ever been in a situation where they somehow were forced to communicate with someone they completely loathed? What was it like and how did you react?

I don't bother hating. It's really not worth the wasted adrenaline.

I've been in touch recently with a friend from high school. When I mentioned a couple of the "bad boy" types in our class, in the context of "whatever happened to ______?", she went off like a rocket about how much she hated them, how they'd made her life a living hell for four years, how she hoped they'd died lingering deaths.

It was strange. I mean, they weren't nice to me either - they weren't nice people. But I remember them as being sort of run-of-the-mill jerks, not anyone to get all huffed about years later.

Of course a stepmother is a much closer relationship, so it's not an exact match. Harder to get away from someone who lives in your house, after all.

yes.
like this.

There are two people in this world I hate...and I mean HATE. One is my ex-wife but and the other is the guy she tried to run off with. God help his soul if I ever see him.

Hate, oh yes....I can hate.

Tried? What happend?

As for somebody I hate more then anything. I can only think of one and this was from back in high school. This girl ws just a ***** and insited on being in or near my group of friends at all times. Since she didn't agree with our sense of humor she try and boss us around or start slapping us. So one day I just started calling her a ****. She kept insiting I was wrong then one day got pregnant from some other girls boyfriend.

Looks like I was right afterall. I still hate her rotten guts and I haven't thought of her until just now when I read this thread.

it was amzing how reading your story could bring back the hatred in just one moment

hehehe

At my grandfather's funeral.

When I was 8 years old, I spent the summer with my great-uncle (grandpa's brother) and his wife. Over the course of that summer, my great-uncle sexually molested me on a daily basis.

Grandpa's funeral, 13 years later, I came into speaking distance of the man for the first time since them. And he hugged me. And God help, there was no way for me to get out of that situation without making a scene. I nearly vomited; it was awful.

Afterward, my mother and sister were asking me, "why did you hug him?" And I was like, "HE hugged ME, and there really wasn't anything I could do about it without drawing attention to the situation." So, I get brownie points for being a class act and not disrupting my grandfather's funeral...but blech!

Under the assumption that your boys are of an appropriate age, why don't you let them decide that for themselves?


Yes'em.

that's beautiful

The older of the two is 13 and the younger one is 9. When their mom died, they were 5 and 10 months. The younger one has no memories of her and has problems understanding how it is possible that he has two mommies.

The older one has sketchy memories and knows he has an older brother, but I'm not sure how much of an emotional connection there is.

I've tried to get my husband to talk to our older one about what happened, but he avoids the issue. I'm still trying to understand why wasn't the older son brought to the United States and he was left in the Philippines to be cared for by other relatives after my husband and his mom got married.

The Filipino culture revolves heavily around family and I want my kids to grow up with that. I want them to understand and appreciate that they have an older brother, but I can't get my husband to tell them what happened. I wasn't there so I can't say much.

Actually, this issue isn't really related to raising my boys. I'm just not sure how open I should be with them communicating with their brother. Should I just make them email him? Remember, I have no clue how much Robert (that's their older brother) knows about his brothers' life. I know they know next nothing about him because we have no way really of finding stuff out, except through their aunt.

I guess I have hated.

My step dad. He was a Marine during the end of the Vietnam conflict. He was very strict.

I was about 7 or 8 and he used to beat me and my sister with a 2 by 4 for things like, "not wiping the table clean enough after breakfast."

I was kicked out by age nine to live with my dad.

As I grew, from time to time, I had to see him at one function or another. We always glared at one another with deep hatred. I think I could have killed him given the chance.

Finally I had some taste of justice when my mother divorced him and took everything including half of his pension.

The kicker was his fully restored Ford Thunderbird. She sold it for 1000.00 to a friend when it was easily worth 10k + She didnt even give him a chance to buy it. That felt pretty good.

I assume it maybe the vulnerability of the newly divorced\widowed parent seeking love in all the wrong places. Then it turns out that the scum they drag out of the gutter ends up being too imature to handle children or even a relationship.

In Weebs example...I admire the fact that you didn't grab a 2/4 and repay the favor. I know I would have and I'd be rotting in prison right now. Seems the bad people always seem to get away with it.

The only person I've ever hated was the guy I dated all through high school. In a nutshell, he mentally dominated and abused me, tried to kill me once and of course he cheated on me. The after we broke up, he stalked me to the point that I almost needed intervention from the police.

Yeah, I guess I still hate him.