Playing tech support for the family is like...Follow

a 3 legged cat trying to bury a **** on a frozen pond. Seriously.

I went back home on vacation and relatives were coming out of the woodwork like cockroaches with computer problems. All expecting me to fix them. In some cases, they literally thought I could pull operating systems out of thin air. I more or less blew most of them off. However, I had to help out the folks. After all, they raised and fed me.

So I spent roughly 7 hours trying to polish the **** that was my Pop's computer. It was beyond repair. He had so much spyware and viruses it was impossible to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. Unfortunately, I didn't have all the software with me to completely nuke it and reload. (I was on vacation.)

So I take it back home with me promising to get it back up and running and FedEx it once I finished. I upgraded the RAM, nuked and completely reloaded it. Getting rid of Windows ME in favor of XP Pro and loading and updating Spybot, and Symantec. I even created some instructions with screen shots and the whole 9 yards explaining how to keep Spybot and Symantec updated, and how to run weekly scans.

Then, I pack it up and ship it back, also with a brand new keyboard, fully expecting a phone call once it was unpacked.

Sure enough, he calls today while I'm at work. It came up with the screen saying that there was a software or hardware change and asking if he wanted to boot up in safe mode, etc. After having him try the last known good, etc, I realize this is going to take some time. I tell him I'll call him after work.

I go home, and make the call. I figure I'll have him crack open the case and reseat some stuff, typical troubleshooting procedures. Easy right?

It took me 40 minutes to get him to find the RAM. No sh[i][/i]it.

Long story short, (ok, well shorter) I spend 2 and a half hours on the phone walking him through a bunch of troubleshooting only to have the PC come up to the same screen. At this point, I told him to take it to the PC repair shop that has been soaking him for the last 3 years. I also hinted at never calling me for computer help again.

Sorry, had to rant. There went my Friday night. Never again do I help family with their computers. Even the ones that raised me.

Try installing a wireless network and getting pestered about me losing the cables. Or being told that while the modem is in the basement, the computer in the living room needs to be on for the one upstairs to work, because they're in the network.

Or having to explain 3 times why the modem has to be on, not just the router.

And if you want spyware, my brother's computer has some "Aurora" crap that pops up 3 windows every navigation. His startup menu scroll is rediculous. I ran Adaware and the thing had a seizure.

My Pop's had 867 when I first ran it. It's the ****.