Social Interaction experimentsFollow

As some of you may know, traffic in DC is abominable, to the point where some days it’s better to take the next exit and turn around and go home, or turn down any job that doesn’t offer 7-3 or 10-7 scheduling. At some point some genius negotiated a free ride in a stranger’s car down HOV-3 in exchange for being a warm body, and so the slugline was born.

I love to slug when I can, nothing like getting in to work free every day and napping/reading the whole way. Now my work demands that I attend all sorts of meetings, so I drive and pick up slugs on my way in. Most times I’ve done this I’ve gone by accepted slugging rules- I keep my seats clean enough for someone to sit on, I don’t play offensive things on the radio, I ask if the temperature’s comfortable, I don’t speak unless spoken to and it’s a relatively peaceful ride.

Did I mention I get sleepy when I drive? I do.

I need to be entertained, and when I’m being quiet and can’t amuse myself due to the fact that I have two strangers snoring in my car, I get cranky. This caused me to search out Howard Stern one morning and listen to him carp one more time about the FCC when I picked up an elderly white couple one day, just to see how they would react. Once the wife started backseat driving, I not only raised the volume, but switched it to the Spanish station and played meringue for the next fifteen minutes. The day after that I picked up slugs and dropped them off 45 min later in the city, and listened to nothing but the urban (read:Black) station. One of my slugs was a middle-aged white guy, and one an older black gentleman. The older black gentleman and I cackled with glee at the R. Kelly/Jay-Z imitations while the middle aged white guy clutched his briefcase so hard his knuckles turned white and pretty much leaped out of my car when it we reached the curb. It was funny to note he seemed angry, although I’m not sure why. This morning I made a mix CD of sappy depressing late 90s music, and I picked up two guys, one Latino and one Whitey. Both settled down for a nap, and that’s when I put my complaint rock on. At times I sung along and with definite feeling, even shaking my fist at times of particular poignancy. I could tell they were wondering when the hell I would put the news station on. Both jumped out at the same stop, fairly early in my drive.

So what next? I need something interesting enough to keep me awake, but not annoying enough so it’s obvious that I’m abusing my passengers. Can’t afford to lose ‘em, as it would add another 40 min to my commute.

Uggh, last time i was down in DC I got caught on I-95 at 5pm. We got through the city around 10 at night... 5 hours of my life taken.. I want them back!

I'm there. I'll sit in shotgun and play banjo for you. I have to warn you I'm not very good though. I just found out over a week ago I am a lesbian..... at least I was told I was by someone else.




Have you tried Weird Al Yankovich? I would laugh to see that

did you consider making them pay and/or getting a life-sized dummy to sit shotgun/backseat? a Real Doll would be hilarious, and you'd probably get off without a ticket if you did get pulled over (let your passenger in that case "service" the cop).

so do people just wait on the on-ramps like it's the cabbie lane at the airport? i've never encountered such traffic (and am damn grateful, btw).

I think we have a winner! Shall we start a pool for banjo lessons? Saru?

If that ain't payin, I don't know what is. I don't think I could bring myself to just stand out in one of those lots waiting for a ride. Then again, I refuse to countenance living anywhere with traffic such as you describe.

Traffic that bad validates a lot of cruelty, IMHO. So torture away with my blessings. Try This for your new driving song. Burn a whole CD with nothing but that, set your player to repeat, crank it up, and sing along at the top of your lungs. Extra points if you can get your voice to crack at the right times and can roll a few tears.

Hm. I think I will. Except I'll alternate it with the Cure's "Pictures of You." or maybe some Morrisey. Pretty much what i did today, though.




Maybe I should leave some chicken in the car overnight. Or some ceviche.

Here's one to take that nasty Boy George music out of the mind...

Deborah was a Catholic girl
she held out till the bitter end
Carla was a different type
she's the one who put it in
Mary was a black girl
I was afraid of a girl like that
Suzen painted pictures
sitting down like a Buddha sat


Reno was a nameless girl
a geographic memory
Cathy was a Jesus freak
she liked that kind of misery
Vicki had a special way
of turning sex into a song
Kamala, who couldn't sing,
kept the beat and kept it strong


Zilla was an archetype
the voodoo queen, the queen of wrath
Joan thought men were second best
to ************ in a bath
Sherry was a feminist
she really had that gift of gab
Kathleen's point of view was this
take whatever you can grab


Seattle was another girl
who left her mark upon the map
Karen liked to tie me up
and left me hanging by a strap
Jeannie had a nightclub walk
that made grown men feel underage
Mariella, who had a son,
said I must go, but finally stayed


Gloria, the last taboo
was shattered by her tongue one night
Mimi brought the taboo back
and held it up before the light
Marilyn, who knew no shame,
was never ever satisfied
Julie came and went so fast
she didn't even say goodbye


Rhonda had a house in Venice
lived on brown rice and cocaine
Patty had a house in Houston
shot cough syrup in her veins
Linda thought her life was empty
filled it up with alcohol
Katherine was much too pretty
she didn't do that **** at all


Pauline thought that love was simple
turn it on and turn it off
Jean-Marie was complicated
like some French filmmaker's plot
Gina was the perfect lady
always had her stockings straight
Jackie was a rich punk rocker
silver spoon and a paper plate


Sarah was a modern dancer
lean pristine transparency
Janet wrote bad poetry
in a crazy kind of urgency
Tanya Turkish liked to ****
while wearing leather biker boots
Brenda's strange obsession
was for certain vegetables and fruit


Rowena was an artist's daughter
the deeper image shook her up
Dee Dee's mother left her father
took his money and his truck
Debbie Rae had no such problems
perfect Norman Rockwell home
Nina, 16, had a baby
left her parents, lived alone

Bobbi joined a New Wave band
changed her name to Bobbi Sox
Eloise, who played guitar,
sang songs about whales and cops
Terri didn't give a ****
was just a nihilist
Ronnie was much more my style
cause she wrote songs just like this

Jezebel went forty days
drinking nothing but Perrier
Dinah drove her Chevrolet
into the San Francisco Bay
Judy came from Ohio
she's a Scientologist
Amaranta, here's a kiss
I chose you to end this list.

Hey, I happen to love the song. I searched high and lo to get it and now listen to it at least once a day. :)

you want sadism? Go looking through your old tapes to find nothing but Pet Shop Boys, New Order and b-side Cure songs. Throw in a little Echo and the Bunnymen, top it off with Erasure covering ABBA (aside: Saw erasure once upon a time, stage outfit on one included, and was limited to, black cowboy hat, bolo, black cowboy boots and black leather chaps. gotta love it.) and you have a mix that is guaranteed to cause pain.

i always go with "One Ball Reilley"...

well it is her property/service that she is lending to those in need...therefore i would suggest she can do anything she wants to...kind of a "My house, my rules" outlook...