Is 26 too young to have a midlife crisis?Follow

I've been in a very weird place lately. I feel like I'm getting too mature and domestic and settled. I mean, just a couple of years ago I would go to raves all the time and get high on random letters of the alphabet, and now I'm looking into buying a house. Instead of blowing my money on the latest Sony toys I'm balancing my chequebook. Instead of getting drunk off my *** and staggering into someone else's bed at 3am I'm going to bed at 9:30 every night and lying awake until 2am worried about bills. I HATE this state of mind I'm in. I feel like I'm letting myself get old.

Anyone else going through something similar? It's like I'm getting tired of being a mature adult and I'm missing being an irresponsible youth. I haven't been to a pub or a movie in months. I mean, I fu[b][/b]cking fold my laundry before it wrinkles. I don't feel like ME anymore, and it's depressed the hell out of me. Is this what a midlife crisis feels like? Or am I just in a rut? Feedback? Suggestions? Psychological analysis? GFYs? Anything at all? Thanks. :/

LOL It has nothing to do with getting old. It is called maturity, and in some cases it is a blessing. Maturity often rescues us from a life style that otherwise would kill us one mistake after another! Welcome to the official world of adulthood!

It's annoying as hell. I'm not even sure WHY it's annoying. I just feel like I'm letting "it" happen to me, whatever "it" is. I miss going out with my friends and partying until sunrise, I miss having fun and not stressing over everything.

I sit here every night and do the exact same routine. My boyfriend comes home from work. He plays FFXI for a while whilst I watch TV. One of us makes dinner. We eat our meal, then watch a movie. He goes to bed, I browse the internet for an hour or two and then I go to bed. Repeat. Ad nauseum. Every single day is the exact same thing. I want to go out to a pub or something but then I think about it and can't justify "wasting the money". I haven't taken any sort of illicit substance in three years. I haven't gotten good and drunk in over a year. I haven't danced in two years. But I do the dishes every fuc[/b]king day. How do you get through this? At what point will I become "comfortable" with my settled and uneventful existence? Seriously, I think about it and want to cry. I feel like I'm wasting my life on stupid sh[b]it like deciding what laundry detergent is the best bargain.

I don't WANT to be settled. It's like I've let myself become numb to life. I don't even TRY to go out and have fun anymore. And then every once in a while it's like I wake up for a moment and wonder how the hell I got here.

Sorry to go all deep and serious, I'm just going through a really rough spot right now and it's left me questioning who I even am.

Sounds to me that your are growing up. We all eventually complete this major task of re-evaluating ourselves. Drugs are fun but always remember, there is a fine line between a pothead and an addict. Same goes for any drug. I am an avid pothead, been dry for 4 days, but i usually tend to smoke about an ounce every 5-6 days. Before you say addict, I usually end up supporting my sister and her boyfriend.

Just remember that you are bettering yourself and the life of your future, if not present, offspring. Buying a house is a big investment. It gives you a great deal of equity. Bills will always equal stress, there is no way around that. I think you are in more of a rut than a midlife crisis. Ruts usually tend to make you doubt yourself and become depressed. Midlife crisis usualy tend to make you have the need to make a mark for yourself in life. People tend to become greedy during this stage.

The best advice for a depressed person is the following: Go outside and do the things you want to do but dont feel up to doing. I was one of those kids that stayed up in his room contiplating and reflecting on every aspect of every little thing. Thinking too much about anything is depressing. Scrape up a little cash from your budget and splurge on yourself once in a while.

I know my thoughts aren't best expressed by the layout of this post. After the age of 25 the body tends to slow down little by little. Also, if you have been really depressed recently, you might want to get checked for S.A.D. SAD, is a seasonal depression due to the lack of exposure to sunlight. The days get shorter, less time to due things before dark. Believe it or not alot of people are effected by this problem. I hope this remotely helps you in understanding what you might be going through.

Yeah, you're probably right. It just seems like I'm letting life go by without me. Tomorrow I'm going to wake up and be 40 and wonder where all the time went, you know? Wonder why I didn't make the most of my "youth" and why I let myself grow so numb to life that I didn't notice the time whizzing past me.

Maybe I'm just restless or something, I've got a lot on my plate right now and it's definitely getting to me. I'll find out in three weeks whether I'll be allowed to stay in my country or be forced to leave. I'm "between jobs" right now and the job market is looking pretty grim at the moment. I'm probably just looking back wistfully at those years where my only concern was whose couch I could crash on that night. Even so, I feel so uncertain and unstable inside, like I've just drunk a whole pot of coffee and chased it with a couple of cups of sugar. Restless I guess.

Anyway, please forgive me for this. Nothing in this entire topic that I've posted has made a lick of sense but it's midnight and it's quiet here and it's so easy to let my mind dwell on stuff like this. Too easy.

Nope, I will not forgive you for your trespasses. Lol, dont be so tactful. GFY and relax abit. Remember, its 6:00am est, what else could we be doing? Exactly, glad to make you feel better. No harm, no fault.

First off, go to bed together. I know sometimes it sucks but it helps. I am 33, been married 12 years, got 3 kids, and went through what you are going through a few years ago. Bills suck, there never is enough money, feel like you always do the exact same thing. Just say **** it! Go out, enjoy yourself, and forget the other **** for a while. 26 is still very young.

I stick by the bed thing though...."never send a hot woman to a cold bed alone" it just ain't right.

Mahahaha!!!!

Yeah I am, actually my wife is still damn hot. Lucky me :)

Been there. Done that. Passed on the t-shirt.

Edit because that probably wasn't enough information. I've had four girlfriends, one of whom I dated for over three years. Christina, Jana, Alicia and Jessica. Jessica's an actress, and hot. After her, I was pretty sure girls just don't do it for me. So I resolved to let the feminine mysteries remain a mystery, she and I ended up really good friends, then her mum married my uncle. I took that as a sign that I was meant to be ****. I mean, even if she IS hot, she's my cousin. >_<

Besides, Max is my life. I've been with him for three years, I moved halfway around the world for him, and I'm as desperately in love with him as the day we met. So, bonking a chick isn't the answer. Besides, it's hard to find a girlfriend who isn't threatened by the fact that her boyfriend has better fashion sense than she has.

Edited, Tue Nov 16 07:30:04 2004 by Saboruto

No matter how mature you get to be, never forget to have fun! I'm 25, Im married, I have a house, I have a child, I have a business of my own. I get in the same funk you are innow every once in awhile. When that happens, I purposefully forget about the bills that need to be paid and call up my girlfriends for a girls night out. Dancing is cheap. Movies can be cheap if you dont go all out and spend a lot of money on snacks.
Make sure you budget a little bit of fun money. Even if you can only go out once a month, it's still once a month more then it sounds like you're doing. A part of growing up and becoming mature is learning to balance both becoming an adult and having fun. If you dont give yourself time to have fun here and there, you're never going to be happy. You'll start to look at your boyfriend and unconciously blame him. You'll look at your job and grow frustrated. A person should not have to give up her fun in life when they become adults. We just have to work a little harder at fitting it into our schedule.

I wish you luck and hope you find your happiness. Getting mature has its pains, but so did being a child and being a teenager. Each stage in life has its pros and cons. But being an adult can be a lot of fun. You just need to know how to make it work for you.

Edited, Tue Nov 16 09:30:06 2004 by deadsidedemon

Yeah, man, take their advice. It's actually justified to waist money once in a while, providing you do it responcibly. BTW, you make it sound like leaving all the "happy pills" is a bad thing...you've done good not getting high off of random letters of the alphabet! Keep that up no matter what, man!

Just try to have some fun once in a while, you'll feel better. Like...plan out a romantic evening with your BF. Before he gets home and decides to play FFXI, eat, then sleep...have all the lights to your home off.

Light up candles from the door to the table, leading him there for a meal that is already prepared, romantic music would also be a plus. From there, you can dance with him for a little bit IF you want...and well...your bed room is pretty much calling for you.

That's when you have rough animal sex. As payment for my survices, you have to call out my name at least once during intercourse.

Maybe it's time for a change? It doesn't have to be huge but maybe you need to move to a different town or country even. Try a different career path. Find a different hobby. It's a big world out there and sometimes people just need a big change to shake things up a bit. 26 is young you have plenty of time to find yourself yet.

In my own personal 23 year old opinion, it doesnt sound like adulthood to me. You already sound mature. Sounds like you aren't doing the things you believe are fun.

I don't know your situation with your boyfreind, whether he's an energetic person or what not, but you may want to suggest going out and doing what you want for a change. Ask him if he wants to go dancing on a Saturday night. Take a mini trip somewhere, just get out of the house.

Same thing happened in my last relationship of 5 years. We got bored and split up.

Gadin