Browsing for interesting news articles this morning as I dragged *** into work, I found (at least what I consider to be) a few keepers.
First up is a Czech retail store's attempt to make female employees wear red headbands when they are menstruating. Article here.
(Tare, let 'er rip!)
Next is a rather disturbing report on how an LA hospital fails to account for all of its surgical equip post-op. Article here.
(Surely someone has something to say about this.)
And finally, as if the 1337 among us weren't bad enough, they're going to "transliterate" the Bible. Surely this makes baby Jesus cry. Article here.
(Everybody should have fun with this.)
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We believe that no group of people should be excluded from the Gospel message due to cultural or linguistic barriers.
Sweet Jesus on a popsicle stick. Is it just me or do these kids already have a language that the bible is printed in? Maybe....Quite possibly.....English? No? Wha? Oh, ****, that's right, they have made a new language! Who needs boring old english anyway, it's not like you really need it.
Pffftt.... it's a joke. Basicly someone just takes an online copy of the KJV and feeds it through one of the bajillion "l33t sp43k" translators on the net. That's not a "project", it's something to do with a spare hour.
Now if they were printing it and distributing it to Christian bookstores or something, I might have a different opinion.
Now if they were printing it and distributing it to Christian bookstores or something, I might have a different opinion.
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Now if they were printing it and distributing it to Christian bookstores or something, I might have a different opinion.
Like the Goodnews Bible you mean?
Disclaimer:
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
That's the Ebonics or Street Talk or whatever one? Yeah, like that.
Of course while we might see it as silly, I guess anything like that which gets your word out (or Word out in this case) is points in your favor. Hell, the DNC ought to print out fliers of its beliefs and policies in Klingon and Elvish just because every Star Trek/Tolkien dork who knows Klingon/Elvish will get one and read it just to see if they translated it correctly.
Edited, Fri Jul 30 10:16:21 2004 by Jophiel
Of course while we might see it as silly, I guess anything like that which gets your word out (or Word out in this case) is points in your favor. Hell, the DNC ought to print out fliers of its beliefs and policies in Klingon and Elvish just because every Star Trek/Tolkien dork who knows Klingon/Elvish will get one and read it just to see if they translated it correctly.
Edited, Fri Jul 30 10:16:21 2004 by Jophiel
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Yes, and that's six more votes, yay.
Edited to add: if my employer wanted me to wear a red headband as a warning that I might be emotional and irrational and what not, I'd just wear it all the time. And make sure they had reason to believe it.
Edited, Fri Jul 30 10:48:01 2004 by SamiraX
Edited to add: if my employer wanted me to wear a red headband as a warning that I might be emotional and irrational and what not, I'd just wear it all the time. And make sure they had reason to believe it.
Edited, Fri Jul 30 10:48:01 2004 by SamiraX
In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
If the Democrats can carry the everyman Tolkien swing vote, the election is in the bag 
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
CrimsonPhoenyx wrote:
First up is a Czech retail store's attempt to make female employees wear red headbands when they are menstruating.
(Tare, let 'er rip!)
(Tare, let 'er rip!)
/embarassingly removes her favorite red headband.
Bah! Now everyone's doing it!
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
Quote:
First up is a Czech retail store's attempt to make female employees wear red headbands when they are menstruating.
So, that's why Ralph Macchio wore that headband in The Karate Kid!
That headband thing is a joke. Just as we should follow Old Testament law regarding homosexuality, I firmly believe that menstrating should be covered the same way:
"When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening. If a man lies with her and her monthly flow touches him, he will be unclean for seven days; any bed he lies on will be unclean.
When a woman has a discharge of blood for many days at a time other than her monthly period or has a discharge that continues beyond her period, she will be unclean as long as she has the discharge, just as in the days of her period. Any bed she lies on while her discharge continues will be unclean, as is her bed during her monthly period, and anything she sits on will be unclean, as during her period. Whoever touches them will be unclean; he must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. When she is cleansed from her discharge, she must count off seven days, and after that she will be ceremonially clean. On the eighth day she must take two doves or two young pigeons and bring them to the priest at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting. The priest is to sacrifice one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. In this way he will make atonement for her before the LORD for the uncleanness of her discharge."
Anyone who disagrees with me hates religion and is probably a dirty kitten eating liberal.
"When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening. If a man lies with her and her monthly flow touches him, he will be unclean for seven days; any bed he lies on will be unclean.
When a woman has a discharge of blood for many days at a time other than her monthly period or has a discharge that continues beyond her period, she will be unclean as long as she has the discharge, just as in the days of her period. Any bed she lies on while her discharge continues will be unclean, as is her bed during her monthly period, and anything she sits on will be unclean, as during her period. Whoever touches them will be unclean; he must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. When she is cleansed from her discharge, she must count off seven days, and after that she will be ceremonially clean. On the eighth day she must take two doves or two young pigeons and bring them to the priest at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting. The priest is to sacrifice one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. In this way he will make atonement for her before the LORD for the uncleanness of her discharge."
Anyone who disagrees with me hates religion and is probably a dirty kitten eating liberal.
Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
Is there anything God doesn't know?
He rules!
Meow!
He rules!
Meow!
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
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a dirty kitten eating liberal
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Meow!
Hmmm....
Exactly...
Nothin' gets past you, Pickle!
Nothin' gets past you, Pickle!
What's bred in the bone will not out of the flesh.
Hell, the DNC ought to print out fliers of its beliefs and policies in Klingon and Elvish just because every Star Trek/Tolkien dork who knows Klingon/Elvish will get one and read it just to see if they translated it correctly.
I'm fairly certain we're getting those votes allready.
Disclaimer:
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
The red headband explains the whole Japanese Kamakazi pilot thing back in WW2. Every one of them was on the rag and so pissed off that they weren't issued Midol-izu that they flew their planes into American warships! "I dishonor my family by being bloated and retaining water. But yet I am uncharacteristically unable to contain my emotions-- I wish to cry, eat ice cream, and rip my superior's head off when he speaks to me sharply. How can I regain face for my family's sake? Ah so! I will commit ritual suicide by flying my cramping body into those foreign gaijiin dogs! Banzaiiiiii!"
Totem
Totem
Leave your thai hooker mensturation cunlingus fantasies out of this Totem.
Disclaimer:
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
CrimsonPhoenyx wrote:
Browsing for interesting news articles this morning as I dragged *** into work, I found (at least what I consider to be) a few keepers.
If you want random, amusing news links and ridiculous comments on such, I encourage you to check out www.fark.com. Then we can keep this forum to ridiculous comments on each other.
publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
I've earned my red wings, Smash. Have you?
Totem
Totem
Quote:
I've earned my red wings, Smash. Have you?
The above discussion deserves a thread of it's own.
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I've earned my brown wings. Have you?
FTF-Pulse.
Debalic wrote:
CrimsonPhoenyx wrote:
Browsing for interesting news articles this morning as I dragged *** into work, I found (at least what I consider to be) a few keepers.
If you want random, amusing news links and ridiculous comments on such, I encourage you to check out www.fark.com. Then we can keep this forum to ridiculous comments on each other.
Where do you think I got the links?
RACK pickleprince!
Totem
Totem
I've earned my red wings, Smash. Have you?
I don't know, but I did spend about a week with the Hells Angels in Oakland and remember about a day. So anything's possible.
Disclaimer:
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
To make a long story short, I don't take any responsibility for anything I post here. It's not news, it's not truth, it's not serious. It's parody. It's satire. It's bitter. It's angsty. Your mother's a *****. You like to jack off dogs. That's right, you heard me. You like to grab that dog by the bone and rub it like a ski pole. Your dad? Gay. Your priest? Straight. **** off and let me post. It's not true, it's all in good fun. Now go away.
Jophiel wrote:
That headband thing is a joke. Just as we should follow Old Testament law regarding homosexuality, I firmly believe that menstrating should be covered the same way:
"When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening. If a man lies with her and her monthly flow touches him, he will be unclean for seven days; any bed he lies on will be unclean.
When a woman has a discharge of blood for many days at a time other than her monthly period or has a discharge that continues beyond her period, she will be unclean as long as she has the discharge, just as in the days of her period. Any bed she lies on while her discharge continues will be unclean, as is her bed during her monthly period, and anything she sits on will be unclean, as during her period. Whoever touches them will be unclean; he must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. When she is cleansed from her discharge, she must count off seven days, and after that she will be ceremonially clean. On the eighth day she must take two doves or two young pigeons and bring them to the priest at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting. The priest is to sacrifice one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. In this way he will make atonement for her before the LORD for the uncleanness of her discharge."
Anyone who disagrees with me hates religion and is probably a dirty kitten eating liberal.
"When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening. If a man lies with her and her monthly flow touches him, he will be unclean for seven days; any bed he lies on will be unclean.
When a woman has a discharge of blood for many days at a time other than her monthly period or has a discharge that continues beyond her period, she will be unclean as long as she has the discharge, just as in the days of her period. Any bed she lies on while her discharge continues will be unclean, as is her bed during her monthly period, and anything she sits on will be unclean, as during her period. Whoever touches them will be unclean; he must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. When she is cleansed from her discharge, she must count off seven days, and after that she will be ceremonially clean. On the eighth day she must take two doves or two young pigeons and bring them to the priest at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting. The priest is to sacrifice one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. In this way he will make atonement for her before the LORD for the uncleanness of her discharge."
Anyone who disagrees with me hates religion and is probably a dirty kitten eating liberal.
Being around a woman during her monthlies always makes me feel unclean.
And you could probably do the sacrifice of pigeons in NYC - there's enough of them there, and nobody would think you were particularly weird.
However, NYC makes most people feel unclean.
Quote:
Being around a woman during her monthlies always makes me feel unclean.
Wow, Pulse says the same thing. You guys should hang out. ;)
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