Proof that I am a Psycho ^^Follow

Juust one phrase ... MONTY PYTHON'S FINAL FANTASY!!;) Thank you!! Someone get me John Cleese's Telli please!!

The Kettle says to the Pot.

How about a new Notorious Monster? The Black Knight!! ;)

Arthur and his trusty servant Patsy "ride" along through the woods.

Suddenly they come apon a stream crossing where two knights are battling in a

heated duel with giant longswords. One is dressed in green and one in black.

Arthur stops and watches the fight.



The two knights attempt to maul each other in many various ways and with many

different tools of medieval weaponry. Finally, when the green knight is

charging the black with a battle axe, the black knight throws his sword

straight through the slit in the green knight's helmet. The green knight falls

to the ground, bleeding profusely. The black knight steps forward and pulls

his sword out of the helmet. King Arthur, impressed with the black knight's

fighting, motions to Patsy and they "ride" forward.



Arthur: You fight with the strength of many men, sir knight.

(The black knight does not respond)

Arthur: I am Arthur, king of the Britons.

(no response)

Arthur: I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me at my

court at Camelot.

(no response)

Arthur: You have proved yourself worthy. Will you join me?

(no response)

Arthur: You make me sad. So be it! Come, Patsy!



As Arthur and Patsy start to ride past the black knight, he suddenly speaks:



Black Knight: NONE SHALL PASS.

Arthur: (taken aback) What?

Black Knight: NONE SHALL PASS.

Arthur: I have no quarrel with you, good sir knight, but I must cross

this bridge.

Black Knight: THEN YOU SHALL DIE.

Arthur: I *command* you, as king of the Britons, to stand aside.

Black Knight: I MOVE FOR NO MAN.

Arthur: So be it! (draws sword)



A short battle ensues, where Arthur, relatively unencumbered by armor, easily

dodges the slow and heavy strikes by the black knight. Finally, Arthur

dodges a strike, steps aside, and cuts the black knight's left arm off with

his sword. Blood spurts from the knight's open shoulder.



Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.

Black Knight: 'Tis but a scratch.

Arthur: A SCRATCH? Your arm's off!

Black Knight: No it isn't!

Arthur: Well what's that then? (pointing to the arm lying on the ground)

Black Knight: I've had worse.

Arthur: You LIAR!

Black Knight: Come on, you pansy!



There follows an even shorter foray, at the end of which Arthur easily cuts

off the black knight's right arm, causing it and the black knight's sword to

drop to the ground. Blood spatters freely from the stump.



Arthur: Victory is mine!

(kneeling, praying) We thank thee Lord, that in thy mercy--



He is kicked onto his side by the black knight.



Black Knight: Come on, then! (kicks Arthur again)

Arthur: (on the ground) What?!?

Black Knight: (kicking him again) Have at you!

Arthur: (getting up) You are indeed brave, sir knight, but the fight

is mine!

Black Knight: Ohhh, had enough, eh?

Arthur: Look, you stupid *******, you've got no arms left!

Black Knight: Yes I have!

Arthur: LOOK!!!

Black Knight: Just a flesh wound! (kicking Arthur again)

Arthur: Look, STOP that!

Black Knight: Chicken!!! Chicken!!!!!!!

Arthur: Look, I'll have your leg!

(The Black Knight continues his kicking)

Arthur: RIGHT! (He chops off the black knight's leg with his sword)

Black Knight: (hopping) Right! I'll do you for that!

Arthur: You'll *WHAT*?

Black Knight: Come 'ere!

Arthur: (tiring of this) What're you going to do, bleed on me?

Black Knight: I'm *INVINCIBLE*!!!

Arthur: You're a looney....

Black Knight: The Black Knight ALWAYS TRIUMPHS! Have at you!!

(hopping around, trying to kick Arthur with his one remaining

leg)



Arthur shrugs his shoulders and, with a mighty swing, removes the Black

Knight's last limb. The Knight falls to the ground. He looks about,

realizing he can't move.



Black Knight: Okay, we'll call it a draw.

Arthur: Come, Pasty! (they "ride" away)



Black Knight: (calling after them) Oh! Had enough, eh? Come back and take

what's coming to you, you yellow bastards!! Come back here and

take what's coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!


Now THAT is hard core !!!

Then why did you read my thread? ^^;

ooh, you sure told me

What? You think I read it? Just the first one, don't flatter yourself.





So you're just another asshat then?

Hey that's almost clever.

You're laboring under a misapprehension though. Unlike yourself, I don't have my head so far up my own *** that I can wear it as a hat. I'm just an assh[/i]ole who like to **** off insipid morons like you

[i]Edited, Sat Jul 10 21:24:58 2004 by halfdan

Translation:
I'm a social reject whose entire life revolves around making the world pay for my sorry acne and incestuous relations with my grandfather.

Yeah, I don't understand you at all. Must have been really hard growing up in those conditions, glad to see you did manage to survive the trauma. Oops, sorry, no I'm not, too bad you managed to *live* if that's what you call what you do.

You all suck. Fu[u][/u]ck off and die.

Twiztid




ph34r my l33t fl4m3 sk!llz

I know you are but what am I?

Edited, Sat Jul 10 21:52:56 2004 by CrimsonMagician

The only thing you can do is FTFY? What a ******* reject. It's like: "Yes, I can take something, change a few words and VIOLA! I'm President Bushs entire war council." Boy I bet the Iraqis just love you now.



You mean the **** you slushed this morning? Sorry but thats gone.

Edited, Sat Jul 10 21:57:23 2004 by AriesGhost

Yes, here we go, now a new side track.



What people? And why the **** do I need their aid? You think I give a rats *** about any one heres help? So far the only thing the Asylum has produced are the "I'm anonymous so I'm gonna flame everyone" crowd. Not that it much matters, the only difference between this and all the other boards is the high troll population.

I think a soft boiled egg would do better than most politicians we have today.

PSSST, I think we have several fictional characters running the country now. ;)