Solo ChessFollow

I'm amusing myself in Karazhan, upping my VE rep, but for the life of me I can't solo the chess event. I've looked at several sites, even googled it and picked up some blogs I wouldn't have looked at, but this is the only site where I'll expose myself to ridicule because none of the strats work! At least, I can't make them work.

I hop in the king, blow heroism, get out, twiddle my thumbs waiting to get in the pawn in front of him, move that forward, out, back into king, who is on fire, and whose movement forward is now blocked by some opposing piece. I simply can't move stuff fast enough to make a difference.

Alt strats recommended on various sites include nuking the opposing king with your queen (not even close, king burns to death first); getting the rooks 2 squares diagonally to the middle to maximise aoe on opposing king (mine burns to death first...); 'hopping' into bishops to keep king healed (pathetic heals, and he usually burns to death before I get the second one off...)

I appreciate there's some rng at work on medivh's cheats, but I've been at it over an hour and all that happens is that my king burns to death :(

What am I missing?