Note that there are two kinds of experience debt associated with death:
The "death" debt is divided among your group members, and is assigned as soon as you die. You have to gain additional experience or wait for time to pass to clear this debt.
The "shard" debt is only handed out when you click the "revive" button, leaving a spirit shard at your death point. This debt is not shared with your group. This is to prevent you from being penalized by a group member who declines to recover his shard. This portion of the debt is cancelled as soon as you get your shard back.