Maktub,
Interesting post. It registers on a number of levels. And regardless of whether I agree on every point, I'm pleased that someone put it out there for discussion. I'd even go as far as to chastise you for solely addressing your warning to young women. Predators come in all kinds, and *every* child ought to be wary. Even one tragedy of the kind you have implied, is one too many.
I have so many strong opinions about what you've said that I'm not sure where to start. So, please forgive me if I fall back on the old forum standard of quoting what you've said, and responding point by point. I am not trolling, but attempting to reach a higher level of discourse.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
Maybe whoever is going to be he victim of this won't read this, and maybe you deserve what you get, but as a woman myself I thought I better put out a warning to young ladies who play this game.
Those who have been victimized sexually do not deserve what has happened to them. Ever. I understand your frustration in trying to communicate your point, but this mindset is so dangerous. This is the reason why so many rapists and predators are able to victimize as many as they do before getting caught.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
People are not always what they seem in virtual worlds, and telling someone you will do a nice webbie show is definitely not a good idea.
Agreed. When you look at someone's toon, you have no idea who that "person" is. If someone means you harm, they're certainly not going to worry about being honest with you. And it is not easy to catch a practiced liar.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
I just come out of a group where the webbie show is being sold for all to view for a few plat and laughs.
And how did you know that the person offering the web show was a minor? Was this communicated during conversation? You didn't give us the specifics of the incident. I've assumed that you knew the age of the person in question, but we've already established how hard it is to *know* who's behind a toon.
The flip side of this is, that you might come off a bit prudish and close-minded to those of us that don't like being told how to live our lives. Obviously, you touched a chord in Tarv along those lines.
This is important, because you are trying to accomplish something by posting here, and if you want your message to be heard, you need to consider your audience. If you come off as an angry parent, you may be alienating those you intend to reach.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
If you where my kid I'd box your ears for forgetting the basic internet safety rules.
1) Once again, you're probably alienating those you're trying to reach. The threat of violence is the worst way to convince a teen to do anything.
2) Kudos to you for at least mentioning those rules. EVERY parent should know them, and they shouldn't let their children anywhere near an internet conection until they know them as well.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
EDIT: seeing that my post seems unclear (forgive me as English is not my mother tongue) and I did not want to give anyone any weird ideas) let me put it clearer:
There is nothing to forgive. Thank you for clarifying that English is not your native tongue, and thank you for learning it, so that we can converse. I must admit, that other than a smattering of schoolboy French, I'm unilingual. I have the greatest respect for those who learn my native language.
Maktub the Tulip wrote:
- Out there there are a lot of creeps who are only out fishing for a bit of cheap exitement
- Don't believe anything anyone tells you, how ever nice they are, how ever sincere they may sound.Some people are honest and true, many are not.
- Keep your dignity, if anyone really likes you they wont ask you to show yourself in a way that is not appropriate for church (you get my drift).
- Never give out personal details (your real name, place you live, your phone number) it is very easy to track people once you have that info. Just do a net search and see how many people get into serious trouble, some even end up dead, by trusting too quickly.
- Never go and meet someone you met on the net, especially not if you are a minor. Us old people don't say this to be a pain but because we are seriously concerned about your safety. If you are of age never go alone or without an adult knowing were you go to.
- Have fun playing EQ, and meeting new people, just remember that your safety and dignity comes first.
All true, and good sound advice. (Even if it does sound like it's coming an angry Mom.)
Thank you for posting.
Edited, because I apparently I haven't said my piece I have to just reiterate, that you need to pay attention to Tarv's reaction. Because if you truly seek to warn people of the dangers online, you have to be more aware of how your message will be received.
As oppossed to getting defensive, and striking out, figure out what your detractors take issue with, and learn how to deliver your message more effectively.
Also, if you base your rationale on religious imperative, you have to be prepared for those who don't wish to be preached at.
(Being a fairly open minded agnostic, religous rhetoric has little effect on me, but it will infuriate others. They don't necessarily believe what you do.)
Edited, Sat Apr 15 13:02:52 2006 by BellamDreamguard