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#1 May 17 2004 at 6:44 PM Rating: Decent
Any one have any suggestions on how to convice my dad that EQ is not a time wasting peice of junk that makes my brains go out my ears(which he thinks it is).

>.<.

-thanks

Edited, Mon May 17 19:44:46 2004 by Cygar
#2 May 17 2004 at 6:49 PM Rating: Decent
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3,212 posts
Nope we cant convince your dad, only you can. Make a list of the things you enjoy about eq and how your typing and decision making skills are improving. You may have to negotiate a time limit on your play, or pay for the account yourself if you dont already.
#3 May 17 2004 at 6:51 PM Rating: Decent
It is a waste of time, but on the otherhand sometimes I wonder what isn't a waste of time.
#4 May 17 2004 at 6:52 PM Rating: Decent
As of my typing skills, i can already type 75 wpm at 97% accuracy, ill try talking to him about my decision making skills, i pay for the account, and im only allowed on an hour a day(if im lucky).

:(

Edited, Mon May 17 19:53:00 2004 by Cygar
#5 May 17 2004 at 7:04 PM Rating: Decent
Instead of 1 hour a day, you may convince him of 2 3hour hour sessions per week....

EQ can become a huge timesink.

If you have finished all your homework and chores and present it to him as an option or activity you like doing other than watching TV, including some of the things you get out of it, then he should be reasonable about it. But you too have to be reasonable. Find out from him why he things the things he does about the games...

If he is keeping your time that limited it may be because you are not doing all he has asked you to do before hand....

Also, show him what you are doing and see if you can't get him interested in playing as well... may or may not work for you, but worth a shot
#6 May 17 2004 at 7:06 PM Rating: Decent
Thanks for the advice! I always have my homework done ( i get reasonably good grades :P) when i ask him if i can go on. I also wonder how great it would be to have my dad play with me, too bad he is very old fashioned(being pretty old), and is pretty computer illiterate.I think i will try the 2 3 hour sessions idea, mwhahaha.
#7 May 17 2004 at 7:21 PM Rating: Decent
Do you really want your dad playing everquest with you? I sometimes wonder how married couples can play this game. Being a mom or a dad is a full time job and everquest takes up way to much time to allow for people to really take care of their kid or kids.
#8 May 17 2004 at 7:23 PM Rating: Good
Cygar said:
Quote:
I also wonder how great it would be to have my dad play with me, too bad he is very old fashioned(being pretty old), and is pretty computer illiterate.

You must be pretty young... I'll bet he's not any older than a lot of the people who play and post here... (Me for example!)

As far as the amount of time you're allowed to play, you seem to be a pretty responsible lad, try trading passive entertainment time (like time spent television watching), for active entertainment time (like time spent playing EQ). You might also try and *earn* additional EQ time in exchange for additional chores like *Hey Dad, wash your car for an extra hour*...

As far as getting him to play, first you need to get him to watch you play. Try telling him you'd like to just show him how much fun it is and then log on and take him for a tour of some of the places you solo. Show him an example of trade skilling and explain duos and grouping. Walk him around your *home town* and visit some of the merchants. You could even take him to the library in PoK or Bazaar.

All this will show him that there is more depth to the game (than he thought) and that it is not just about hack and slash. And finally, if it seems like he's enjoying it, offer to roll up a character that the two of you can play together.

Since most fathers would love the chance to do more with their sons, this could be something you could do together. He just needs to see the wonder of it for himself.
#9 May 17 2004 at 7:34 PM Rating: Decent
My parents think it's a waste of time also, and I can't convince them to think otherwise. The problem is after playing for and hour they tell me to get off then 15 mins later im allowed on agian, I can never stay on for long periods of time, which is what I need to do. I usaully just play after school before they get home, that works.
#10 May 17 2004 at 7:42 PM Rating: Good
Here's what to do.

Stick to the rules for the moment.

Find a situation in the game, perhaps a quest for example, where you can ask him for some help.

Choose your moment carefully, tell him about the goal you are trying to achieve, (new, better armour or something), sell it to him so that he can't help but try to help you out.

You know him best, so you will know what will appeal to him, or intrigue him, if you can find something that, 1. he can actually solve or help you with, that 2. will give him a little challenge and 3. gives him a good feeling about helping you, you never know!

The main thing about getting some one else to understand about EQ is to try to explain athat it is a game about character development, it is highly strategic, and can only be played successfully as part of a cohesive well coordinated team.
#11 May 17 2004 at 7:58 PM Rating: Decent
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53 posts
Tell him what I tell my girlfriend: tell him that of all the nasty, habit forming things that can be done out there, EQ (or any MMORPG for that fact) is really nothing at all. Or in my actual words to her, "I could be an alcoholic or crack fiend..."

Seems to work for me. It is just a video game. Make sure you make time for other things, possibly with the family to show him that you aren't 24/7 EQ.

Also point out, like I do to my girlfriend, that watching TV for hours and hours is probably 10x worse than playing a game online where you are actually thinking and relating to other human beings. Not just droning out watching "Must See TV" for 5 hours. She does that...and man, she doesn't say anything at all. She just sits and watches.

Again, works for me.

Edited, Mon May 17 20:58:21 2004 by orionreplay

Edited, Mon May 17 21:00:03 2004 by orionreplay
#12 May 17 2004 at 8:07 PM Rating: Good
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1,907 posts
I could not find it, but there was a discussion recently on the good things about games like EQ. Hopefully someone else will be able to find and link. There were leadership opportunities in the game that cannot happen in the real world. A bunch of older folks following a 13 year old would seldom happen in real life. It teaches you about economy, working hard to gain something, setting goals, etc.

Most of the stuff anyone of any age does for entertainment is just as "useless" as a video game. That is the meaning of hobby or entertainment. If a hobby starts paying you money it's a job.

I would certainly insist the grades stay up and so on, but I would not be as strict on time, especially weekends, because you seem fairly well grounded and intelligent. I am quite happy when the kids are home and I know what they are up to. One night watching the news, seeing what some kids are doing, should make parents jump up and down with joy that you are playing video games. If your chores and homework are kept up, and you still have some other activities as well, then I would see no harm in it.

Edited, Mon May 17 21:07:26 2004 by Kelti
#13 May 17 2004 at 8:35 PM Rating: Decent
First of all, let me reply to DruidOfEQ, yes parenting IS a full time job. I am married with a 20 month old, and it's the hardest job you'll ever have and thank you for recognizing that. But somehow I still seem to be able to EQ a good amount.

Secondly, Cygar, your dad needs to be convinced that EQ will not rot your brain. I'm curious as to how old he is. (Yeah, I know, when someone hits 30 they should be pushed off a cliff, right?)

Does he watch a lot of sports? TV in general? You could possibly use that. "If I can't play EQ, you shouldn't watch football all day long!" You're actually playing/interacting with a game, while he just sits there and watches it.

What about compromise? "Let me EQ 2 hours a day and I'll do the dishes every night. 3 hours and I'll paint the garage. Let me play whenever I want and I'll build an addition to the house!" I'm getting out of hand, but you get the idea.

It's also possible that he secretly wants to use the computer and isn't as PC illiterate as you think.

And it's also possible he's just a jerk.

Anyway you choose to handle this, just don't do or say anything to **** him off, that'll kill your chances.

#14 May 18 2004 at 2:23 AM Rating: Decent
I play with my son on the computer next to me occasionally, and we have great fun. We go on adventures, and are communicating in the game and outside the game at the same time.

On a side note, I see that at one point it helped him develop social skills regarding what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior...in a safe virtual environment. There where a few times when he acted really stupid in-game(he's 10), people let him know and I was with hiim to talk about why certian actions might make another upset. In no time he has turned into a really wise little guy socially in-game, and at school.

He doesn't like to play much anymore, prefers other games and getting out with friends more. But, I think with playing time limits, and supervision this can be a fun learning experience.

Especially if your dad like doesn't know you at all socially

#15 May 18 2004 at 5:44 AM Rating: Good
Hmm, if I didn't know better, I'd think you have MY dad. I can recall being forbidden to buuy the first computer I ever owned (a C64) because it was a total waste of time. Mind you, I was buying it with my money, none of which was allowance (all earned working a summer job). In this case, I did what I wanted. My money, etc. I bought it strictly against orders. And I was allowed to keep the computer through the intervention of my mother who put forth all of the bad things I could be into instead. In my case, I think my dad was almost as scared of having a computer geek son as he was of having a drug addict son. It took him about ten years to see the light, but he did.

Your problem seems to be EQ specific. You want to play EQ and your dad believes it is a waste of time and has no redeeming qualities. Hmm, that sounds like a good definition of MOST hobbies. A waste of time with no redeeming qualiities.

If it is important to you, then I suggest the following:
1. Follow the rules your dad lays out.
2. Tell him that this is important to you.
3. Mention that ALL hobbies are pretty useless which is why they are hobbies and not professions.
4. Point out the potential alternative uses of time: crack, alcohol, loud music, sexual experimentation, etc.
5. Wait ten years for it all to sink in.

It worked for me!

Seriously, you sound like a kid most parents would be proud to have. It takes time to prove that to your own paretns, though. Continue to do well in school, pay for your own EQ account, play when allowed, press for all you can get, and deal with life in general. As time progresses, you'll find that the things you want to do are accepted more and more as you prove that they don't interefere with noraml goals. And even if you don't have a level 65 character, you will have character.

Edited, Tue May 18 06:55:13 2004 by TStephens
#16 May 18 2004 at 6:19 AM Rating: Default
simple, tell him instead youll go out and start taking hard drugs just like all the other kids. that'll soon change his mind.
#17 May 18 2004 at 6:42 AM Rating: Decent
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1,252 posts
TStephens wrote:
Quote:
4. Point out the potential alternative uses of time: crack, alcohol, loud music, sexual experimentation, etc.


what's wrong with "sexual experimentation"? Smiley: grin

seriously. good post.

apart from that, simply ask your Dad what he wants. what are his intentions in regards to your education. which career path would he like you to take (if it's up to him, and not your Ma or yourself Smiley: wink2 ). might well be, that some EQ-parts fit in there.

Edit:
Shockeye wrote:
Quote:
Does he watch a lot of sports? TV in general? You could possibly use that. "If I can't play EQ, you shouldn't watch football all day long!" You're actually playing/interacting with a game, while he just sits there and watches it.


I would not suggest going down that route... don't argue with him like that. that's a negative comment which might put him off.

The "additional chores" idea I like though Smiley: smile

Edited, Tue May 18 07:46:19 2004 by Kajolus
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Characters on Drinal, Povar, EMarr, Firiona Vie.
#18 May 18 2004 at 7:08 AM Rating: Decent
only a hour a day how do you group or lvl LDON sometimes takes longer than that... so if in a group or not you have to leave tell your father that a hour isnt long enough and think of the other people in your group, that might have had to wait for a group only to have a group mate leave after a hour or less. then again I'm 41 and no one tells me when I can play I play when I want and how long I take it your under 18. and yes there are worse things to be doing than EQ.

Edited, Tue May 18 08:09:24 2004 by palepink
#19 May 18 2004 at 8:13 AM Rating: Decent
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703 posts
My mom thinks EQ comes from the devil. I think that aptly describes SOE.
#20 May 18 2004 at 8:26 AM Rating: Decent
deny it, deny everything
#21 May 18 2004 at 9:24 AM Rating: Good
Liberal Conspiracy
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TILT
Quote:
Being a mom or a dad is a full time job and everquest takes up way to much time to allow for people to really take care of their kid or kids
Only if you let it. I play in the evenings after my son is in bed or occassionally on a weekend when he's at a friend's house for the afternoon or something. There's nothing that says you have to spend all day Sunday at the computer or skip making dinner to do a LDoN.
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#22 May 18 2004 at 9:47 AM Rating: Decent
Tell him how your level 65 whatever class with 100 AAs is worth a thousand dollars, that your time spent is actually money earned. Then tell him to go make you a sandwich.

j/k btw
#23 May 18 2004 at 9:51 AM Rating: Decent
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77 posts
I play and my wife plays. EQ usually does not interfere with our lives at all. My kids like to play outside with friends. They like to go to the movies, ball games, and the mall. Personally, I think TV is the most negative influence on the planet, so anything that gets them away from the "idiot box" is fine by me. As far as letting my kids play EQ..... they can play whenever they want, for as long as they want, providing their homework is done, their chores are done, and they maintain good grades in school.

Descarte Meditations Arch Lich - Povar
#24 May 18 2004 at 10:08 AM Rating: Decent
Cygar

All I can say is ... be careful... and I seriously mean this. EQ is a timesink, as almost everyone has stated on this board. It is also extremely addictive. Its creators designed it so that there is always something to do and you feel obligated to play. It is truly different than a hack n' slash or shoot em' up.

I may sound nuts to you, since it is a game. However, there is ALWAYS something more constructive to do than playing Everquest. Sports (health), Studying (smarts), Working (money), or spending time with family (if your dad plays then this may be alleviated).

I am 23 and can honestly say I play too much. I also wish I could take back all of the time I have spent on all of the MMORPGs and put it toward something useful.

Budget your time well. And if there is one thing that I cannot stress enough, do NOT start cancelling real life plans for EQ. At that point, it is all over. Just remember that no matter how many thousands of hours you invest in the game, ultimately your character will end up getting whiped when you stop playing / paying.

Zaltryn

Edited, Tue May 18 11:10:06 2004 by Zaltryn

Edited, Tue May 18 11:14:51 2004 by Zaltryn
#25 May 18 2004 at 10:15 AM Rating: Good
Quote:
Personally, I think TV is the most negative influence on the planet, so anything that gets them away from the "idiot box" is fine by me. As far as letting my kids play EQ..... they can play whenever they want, for as long as they want, providing their homework is done, their chores are done, and they maintain good grades in school.


Very off topic here, but I just thought I'd throw this in for everyone.

About a year ago, I was suffering from constant eye fatigue. I thought I was developing cataracts or something. This was BAD. I couldn't focus my vison acutely enough to read for sometimes hours at a stretch. And there were times when my vision was perfect....on the same days.
After a visit and thorough checkup with a competent opthamologist, I felt sort of dumb. I took eye drops for a week and......
I moved my monitor down from its stand and placed it as low as I could on my desk. I got a taller chair. Effectively, I changed it so that my eyes were no longer forced to stay WIDE OPEN to play games and work.

I learned that lowering your monitor can drastically reduce both eye and neck fatigue. Remember as children, 'Don't sit so close to the TV, it will ruin your eyes!' Well, don't sit under your monitor, because it WILL ruin your eyes. If you have a poor computer desk setup, consider giving it a makeover to something healthier.

With a simple change to something more ergonomic, I regained my acuity of vision (all the time) and I can no longer crack my neck like Agent Smith of the Matrix (regrettably).
#26 May 18 2004 at 10:39 AM Rating: Decent
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75 posts
Ok, I am a parent. I am 50ish. I have two sons that started playing when they were 13 and 14. I was like your dad and told them it was a waste of time and a waste of money.
Someone suggested that you get you dad involved with a quest. Well i can tell you that works. Three years after my youngest son asked for some help (I did not want to help but he begged) I am now playing EQ and the sons are off doing what kids do today.

I enjoy the game but at the same time I know that my RL comes first.

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